SAS Australia 2022 is coming to our tellies tonight, so here are all of the contestants who’ll be getting rough and dirty on the super spicy show.

The list of contestants includes former The Bachelor stars Anna Heinrich and Locky Gilbert, along with model Simone Holtznagel (who you’ll recognise from I’m A Celeb), and other various athletes who will no doubt also fill in the ‘hot person’ niche.

Here’s everyone who will be jumping out of helicopters and rolling in the mud for our enjoyment:

Anna Heinrich, 34 – TV Personality

Won the first season of The Bachelor and an ultra-hot husband in the process. Tim Robards if you’re reading this, I’m free. Does your house need a doormat?

Locky Gilbert, 32 – Reality TV Star

Survivor alum, super hot Bachelor and full-time hotty. SAS did not come to play this year.

Don’t be too mesmerised by his looks though, because he may have accidentally revealed that he’s hitched to Irena Srbinovska in a SAS trailer.

Simone Holtznagel, 28 – Model

Honestly, you could put everyone here on Love Island and it’d basically be the same show.

Don’t underestimate miss Simone Holtznagel however, because her following and her resume is nothing to scoff at. We stan a queen expanding her portfolio.

Barry Hall, 44 – AFL Great

AFL legend who’s dabbled in his fair share of cooked comments before.

A footy player? With a scandal to his name? Colour me shooketh.

Darius Boyd, 34 – Retired NRL Star

SAS Australia loves to chuck an NRL star into the mix and this year’s tribute is Mr Darius Boyd.

Ebanie Bridges, 35 – Professional Boxer

Absolute fkn queen.

Ellia Green, 28 – Rugby 7s Olympian

The SAS Australia 2022 winner (in my mind).

Geoff Huegill, 42 – Olympic Swimming Legend

Something tells me the sports dads aren’t fucking around this year. Surely parenthood has prepared them for being set on fire and yelled at.

Melissa Tkautz, 47 – Singer / Actor

Real Housewives of Sydney legend, actress, singer and multi-talented icon of our times. A hustler. A queen. And apparently, thanks to SAS, a better mother.

Melissa Wu, 29 – Olympic Diver

Olympic medallist and Commonwealth Games gold winner Melissa Wu will undoubtedly kick some fkn ass. And I’m here for it.

We turn to SAS in troubled times for ass-kicking.

Michael Zerafa, 29 – Professional Boxer

His nickname is “Pretty Boy” for a reason.

Millie Boyle, 23 – NRLW Player

Talented. Stunning. Accomplished. We love to see it.

Orpheus Pledger, 28 – Actor

Brb moving to Victoria.

Paul Fenech, 51 – Comedian

You know the face, and your dad probably knows the name. Pauly Fenech is one of the minds behind Aussie cult classics Fat Pizza and Housos, and now he’s adding SAS to his list of comedic achievements.

Riana Crehan, 34 – Motorsports Presenter

I just know motorsports fans are losing their minds right now. A win for the motorsports community.

Richard Buttrose, 49 – Convicted Drug Dealer

No Insta but you can see him in the top row here.

Wayne Carey, 50 – AFL Commentator

No Insta here either but here’s an old pic for your enjoyment.

Seven has teased that the aforementioned stars will be “cut off from the outside world at a brand-new base in unforgiving jungle terrain, bordered by wild seas, dramatic cliff faces and rugged rocky outcrops.” Sounds like fun!

Peep the trailer below:

The most recent season of SAS Australia made headlines for various reasons, including the intriguing salaries that the cast supposedly received, the gross-ass scenes that aired, and, of course, the controversial (read: fucked) decision to cast old mate Sam Burgess.

Ooh, fun lil titbit: the So Dramatic! podcast recently leaked the list of contestants who have apparently been gunning to be cast on SAS Australia for some time.

Have a peek at said list and you’ll notice that some of the folks on the list finally managed to make it through, just for shits and gigs.

The new season of SAS Australia is landing tonight on Seven. Gird thy loins.