Finally Some Closure: An ‘Expert’ Weighed In On The Over Vs Under Toilet Paper Debate

Have you ever been midway through replacing your roll of toilet paper and thought to yourself “is there a scientifically* superior way to do this? Well, there might be a winner in the over or under debate and I can’t believe this counts as news…

In the most “Daily Mail” of Daily Mail articles, etiquette expert Jackie Vernon-Thompson dished on the optimal method of toilet paper hanging.

So let’s settle this once and for all. Does the paper go over… or under?

“Research after research reveals that the proper and most hygienic way to hang your toilet paper is over and not under,” she told the publication.

“Might I add, that goes for paper towels too, if hanging from the wall. Not only is it hygienic, it lends to maintaining proper hygiene, which is proper etiquette.”

I’m sorry. WHAT?!

How does that even make sense?

If it goes under, the roll you’re taking has been sitting further away from the toilet and therefore, further out of harm’s way.

Perhaps it has something to do with a variation in porous qualities between each side of the toilet roll?

For the record, this is not how I thought I’d be spending my day at work today.

“If the paper is over, when you reach for the paper, your fingers will touch only the piece that you plan to use and flush,” Jackie explains.

“However, when it is under, more than likely you are forced to feel for it and touch other parts of the roll and even the wall, which is likely to spread bacteria and germs.

“Any given person may have a specimen on their finger and may place it on the wall where they were feeling for the paper that is rolled under.”

The numbers just don’t add up.

How can that possibly be enough of a difference in bacteria volume to warrant a change of behaviour?

Going forward, hang your toot paper whichever way you want to hang it.

Over, under, sideways, even from the ceiling. It’s your journey.

Whatever the outcome, at least it won’t be as bad as the Queensland lady who had to pee in her sink for six weeks because her real estate agent didn’t fix the loo…