Forget Sexyland, Kmart is the latest and great destination to get your dild-candles. I meant to say candles. Because they’re not dildos, they’re definitely candles. Here’s the scoop.
Earlier this week, Redditor u/MrBowls published a haunting image to the r/sydney sub with the caption “Ok, didn’t expect to see this at Kmart today…”.
No, Mr Bowls. Neither did we.
The image depicts a selection of pink, phallic-shaped objects, each with a bow in the middle, somewhat like a banana.
After a bit of digging, we found out that these are called Decor Pillar Candles and can be purchased for $5 a pop.
“Bring a soothing vibe to your living space by lighting up this Decor Pillar Candle – an elegant addition to your home,” the description reads.
They GOTTA know. Surely they gotta know.
Notably, the candles pictured on Kmart’s website listing do not feature the same bend observed in the Reddit photo. Maybe those in the pic had already been … used.
A few notable comments on the original Reddit thread include “Candildo? Dildandle?” and “good to see they have a flared base”, to which another person replied, “someone will still lose it”.
Classy. Never change.
This isn’t even the first time Kmart has been accused of stocking horny-adjacent items.
Back in January of 2023, a “mini hair remover” became the talk of the town after shoppers noticed its similarity in shape to that of a vibrator.
I mean, COME ON.
Somehow, Kmart has always had a knack for finding its way into the cultural dialogue.
Everything from ~that~ Nadia Bartel Kmart plate incident in 2021 (which she responded to years later in a tell-all interview), to selling a product that was dubbed a “jail cell for your phone” back in 2020.
Anyway, I sure hope those new candles aren’t scented…
