So far, this season of The Bachelor has been a ghoulish carnival of ever-deepening humiliations in the name of “romance” – both for the contestants, who appear to be by turns crazed with romantic ambition and genuinely emotionally tormented by their unnatural competition, and for Matty J, who’s in the unenviable position of trying to please both the women jostling for his heart and the producers of the show. Watching it is like watching this video of a flock of peace doves being obliterated by the Olympic flame: horrific, compelling, and grimly hilarious.

But tonight! Tonight!!! What sacrifice has been made to the God of Reality TV to get us this one, pure moment of actual honey sweetness in a maelstrom of backstabbing Splenda?

Observe: Matty J and Tara, the unfiltered dickhead-movement-deploying girl-next-door, pulling some John Hughes-flick moves on our very own screens:

Cutting off a stream of nervous babble about how she feels like she’s not interesting enough with a kiss? That is some A-grade capital-R Romance that I honestly would not have thought the sweet but simple hunk Matty capable of.

In other words, Tara has come out of nowhere to be a frontrunner in the competition for this affable ab-haver’s heart, and Australia is shipping it hard.


Give the people what they want, Channel 10: six seasons and a movie of Matty & Tara.

Image: The Bachelor