It brings me extreme displeasure to announce some cursed MAFS cross-pollination, for this year’s resident angel man Duncan James was spotted canoodling with Season Nine villain Carolina Santos.
If you need a moment to gather your thoughts and take some deep breaths, I understand. This is a safe space.
An eagle-eyed insider sent Yahoo! Lifestyle photos of Duncan and Carolina getting up close and personal at a venue in Sydney back in January — two months after Season Ten would’ve finished filming.
They told the publication they took the piccies because they recognised Carolina, but obviously couldn’t tell Duncan from a bar of soap as the current season hadn’t aired yet.
“It looked like they were on a date but they had other friends with them,” they said.
I know photos can be misconstrued quite easily and context is key, but you can’t tell me they don’t look cozy as shit. Carolina resting her head and knee against Duncan as she gives him a cuddle? The deep conversation where their heads are, like, 12 centimetres apart and they’re staring intently into each other’s eyes?
‘Tis intriguing to say the least. Consider me gagged, nay gooped, with a hefty dose of terrified.
I say “terrified” because Carolina wasn’t exactly a peach on MAFS last year.
In fact, I’d go as far as saying she was a bully of the highest order who relentlessly tormented her on-screen husband Dion Giannarelli for simply existing (read: skipping breakfast and not listening to rap music).
She also cheated on him with Daniel Holmes, so there’s that.
As for Duncan, the bloke has arguably copped one of the nicest edits on this season of MAFS. From acts of kindness (case in point that horny baking related-photoshoot) to solid communication, he’s stopped at nothing to make his on-screen wife Alyssa Barmonde happy and allay her worries.
But if the Reddit AMA hosted by someone claiming to be Alyssa’s sister is anything to go by, there is allegedly another side of Duncan that we haven’t seen on MAFS.
I don’t know what to believe anymore but regardless, I simply cannot support the idea of Duncan and Carolina canoodling. No siree.
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