Time to light a few candles and scatter roses around the bed because the weather is about to fuck us like there’s no tomorrow. I hope you like orgies ‘cos multiple states are set to cop a drippy deluge. We’re all sitting in the splash zone for this wild ride.
According to the Binches of Meteorology (BoM), a cold front is moving to south-east Australia from the west and it’s not looking pretty.
I’m talking super chilly weather, non-stop showers, heavy rainfall, potential thunderstorms, flood warnings and even the odd snow dump. So you know, nothing we’re not used to down under.
Time for my seasonal depression to creep back in now that the sun is leaving us again. My body was just getting used to having a regular source of vitamin D.
“Rain is expected to return to southeast Australia later this week due to a front and low-pressure system moving across Australia,” said a meteorologist from BoM.
A cold front and low pressure systems will bring widespread showers and #rain to south-east #Aus in the coming days. This may cause renewed flooding for some inland rivers in #NSW.
Check latest forecasts and warnings: https://t.co/gkTMGvu1lS and #BOMWeather app. pic.twitter.com/gAh8wLkca8
— Bureau of Meteorology, Australia (@BOM_au) August 11, 2022
I would very much like it if we never had to experience rain again. My clothes are sodden, my wall has been repainted by persistent mould and my hair never seems to dry. There truly are no positives. Sure I may have gained the power to not need lube anymore since I’m perpetually dripping, but it’s not worth the tradeoff.
I just want to get into my bed without soaking all of my sheets!!!
If you wanted to see the weather phenomenon that’s moving from the west to the south-east, you can below. There’s something so erotic about a bunch of cumulonimbus clouds choosing MY state to squirt all over. Really does something for my “pleasure to have in class” complex.
A cold front will sweep across south-west #WA today, bringing rain, isolated thunderstorms, strong winds and colder temperatures. Cold and gusty winds behind the front will bring showers, small hail and isolated thunderstorms on Tuesday. Latest: https://t.co/yFJNSX7Uwu pic.twitter.com/TjAFdDkV3u
— Bureau of Meteorology, Australia (@BOM_au) August 8, 2022
Although July was the wettest month on record in Australia, the months to come are not looking promising. Unless of course, you’re some freak who delights in being able to soak up the rain with your soggy pores. In that case, the best months of your life are about to come around.
Someone, please tell Mother Nature to stop pegging south-east Australia constantly. It really is getting ridiculous out there.
