In the MAFS 2024 recap for Episode 14, we’ll finally see Michael again (after he was more or less left at the altar) as well as our first batch of MAFS intruders. I’m keen! They look lit.
Following last night’s Commitment Ceremony, Sara has written Tim a letter that basically says she will stop being an asshole and that it’s not her intention to be an asshole, but rather a spicy wifey.
Tristan slept on the couch last night because he needed space. He won’t do it again because he thinks Cassandra is “angry and pissed off” even though she says she is definitely not angry and pissed off.
She feels like they’re only going backwards like a Tame Impala song.
MAFS groom Michael‘s back and no shade to Simon Flocco, his previous groom, but wow, this could very well be a blessing in disguise. Look at Stephen! “He’s as good, if not better,” MAFS expert John Aiken says.
Much like the rest of Australia, Michael is stoked with what he sees.
I hope Jack and Jayden are taking note because this is how long hair is done.
Stephen has an identical twin, and a scar near his eye after being in a terrible car accident when he was younger. He’s been single for five years — so basically his whole life, lol — and is struggling to find someone who wants a monogamous relationship like him.
I’m so invested in Stephen (and also Michael but mostly Stephen) that I am crying during their MAFS vows exchange. They kiss and I am living for the neck grab from Michael.
The older, greyer MAFS couples have been invited to the intruder weddings. Jack‘s keen for some fresh meat even though he assures Tori that he is happy with the meat he’s already got.
And while Timothy has taken jabs at Jack for being into freaky shit like sexy pissing, it would appear that he’s not so vanilla himself.
Our first official MAFS intruder Madeleine is an actress (but doesn’t like “to own that”). She’s also a medium who started to get visions (and audio) after her grandfather died.
She says her “gift” is isolating because people don’t believe it or understand it.
She’s being paired with a super kind man named Ash — I haven’t decided who or what he reminds me of yet.
His older brother passed away two years ago and helps raise his younger brothers. The man seems like an angel but not the kind that his new MAFS wife would be able to speak to.
It’s time for the wedding and what in the Prison Break is this shit?
He turns around and thinks Madeleine is an absolute “knockout”. Lauren thinks she is a size XS and therefore not a medium.
I’ve never seen so much conversation at the MAFS altar and it truly is just like an upright first date.
Ash (great name btw) tells Madeleine that he has a puppy dog heart, but I hope not because then he’d only be alive for another 18 years max.
It’s Madeleine’s turn and she rawdogs her vows which include crying, laughing and shooshing herself. It’s all very weird and Ash must think so too, because he can’t hold eye contact.
Lauren and Tori are having a fucking field day over it. Lucinda is unsurprisingly obsessed with her.
It’s time for their wedding photos which is not a moment too soon for Madeleine to receive a “psychic download” with negative vibes surrounding Ash.
OK but serious question, do you think she’s using that as an excuse for the ick she might be experiencing?
Ash tells her about someone hovering over him in what he believes to be a haunted house. Considering her response, I believe her to be wet over that story. She finds it “cool” and “vulnerable”.
Meanwhile, Michael and Stephen are full vibing the way we really want and need them to.
One of the wedding guests puts her foot in it and comments about Michael’s “baby mummas” to Stephen, who has no fucking idea what she’s talking about.
Michael confirms to Stephen that he’s the biological father of his friends’ two children after donating sperm to them. Stephen thinks it’s amazing because he is also amazing.
Over at the “Mash” (Madeleine and Ash) wedding, Cassandra is reflecting on her relationship with Tristan. She’s worried he doesn’t even like her and asks him, “Are we OK?”
He tells her they’ve been in a bit of a rut before asking her how she’s feeling. Cassandra tells him she’s bored and that shits him because he’s planned heaps of dates for her.
If I was in a relationship for a month and we were celebrating a hug, I’d be bored too. Translation: my coochie would be bored.
Tristan is angry now and gets angry at the producer for asking if he’s trying in this relationship.
Cass needs a moment and I think Tristan needs at least 17 moments because I can see the fire coming out of his ears from here.
Now that we need a new MAFS love story, we go back to Stephen and Michael’s wedding, where Stephen finds out that Michael’s previous match pulled out of the experiment.
This sickens Stephen because he feels like second best. Is he sad that he was second best for Michael, or second best to appear on this show? TBC.
It reminds me of when you’re invited to a Facebook event the day before the party, like either a) a pimple or b) a back-up option.
More MAFS intruders tomorrow, including one very cocky dude. See you for the MAFS recap and in the meantime you can follow me on Instagram for more MAFS dribble.
