Dig deep enough into any of your own social media archives and you’re bound to find some sort of photo that should not be for public consumption. But at least none of those were produced, staged, and edited by your actual place of work. So in that regard, be thankful none of you are featured in this truly bizarre Photoshop hatchet job that Nine staff pulled on Karl Stefanovic and Ally Langdon.
The Today hosts no doubt have a stack of press photos circulating out there, but one utterly bizarre one has floated to the surface yesterday and it ah… only gets weirder the more you look at it.
Appearing in a Sydney Morning Herald story about breakfast TV show ratings, the press photo appears completely normal at first glance, and at first glance only. From there? It gets significantly weirder the more you look at it.
Obvious points about Karl’s miraculously frozen smile aside, the question simply must be asked: What in the blue hell happened to Ally’s right arm?
Where did it go? Did someone just straight up lose it? What was so egregiously wrong with the way her right arm looked in that photo that the best option was to temporarily de-limb her?
It’s not uncommon for composite photos to be rushed together when producers need press photos and stars aren’t in the same room to take a quick snap. And clearly that’s what’s gone on here, with Ally’s image transplanted onto a previous stock shot of Karl.
But again, we stress: Who cut off her right arm? Was she flipping off the camera? Was there a sign reading “KARL EATS ASS” gaffer taped to her arm? Is that the arm she uses to vote Liberal and what we’re seeing is the most over-cautious overcorrection of all time?
Remarkably enough it’s not a leak or a prank either. The photo was distributed by Nine (who, full disclosure, wholly owns this publication but still refuses to acknowledge my repeated pitches for a Cash Cow rival named the “Pay Pig”) meaning it went through several levels of approval before being sent out to god knows who.
Here’s hoping Ally’s arm grows back one day, I guess.