The disgustingly nostalgic Australian Idol will officially be coming back in 2023, baby, which deserves our biggest Mark Holden touchdown ever (RIP to a truly iconic judge). If there’s one thing our media landscape has been missing, it’s a good old-fashioned singing competition with embarrassing auditions and charming hosts so I, for one, welcome the reboot with open arms.
Channel Seven first announced it would be reviving Australian Idol back in 2020, so it’s been a long time coming. By the time the show premieres next year, it would have been 20 goddamn years since the series first graced our screens on Channel Ten. Nothing hits you for six quite like realising you’re older than Australian Idol.
If you’re fanging to find out more about the deeply Auscore singing competition, keep on reading ‘cos we’ve banged together everything we know so far about Australian Idol — from judges to hosts and even those très hilarious auditions, we’ve got it all.
Australian Idol: What we know so far
Will Australian Idol auditions be coming back?
You bet your bottom dollar, they will be.
Channel Seven encouraged shit hot and proper shit singers to audition back in July, and we’ve now copped a squiz at some of the folks who sang like the rent was due.
The auditions kicked off with one lass singing Paloma Faith‘s “Only Love Can Hurt Like This”, which is an absolute slapper. Unfortunately, this poor girl’s rendition was giving Bub’s Idol down at the Fountain Gate mezzanine in Kath & Kim.
Another bloke decided to belt out “Breakeven” by The Script, which I’ve only just realised is actually a very difficult song to sing. He was so bad at belting out a tune that Meghan Trainor — who has already established herself as the benevolent, kind judge — told him that, maybe, singing isn’t for him. Personally I would never recover from hearing those words, so best of luck to this fella and his dashing Tarocash fit.
A third girl sang what I’m guessing was “Good as Hell” by Lizzo, except it did not sound like that and prompted Harry Connick Jr to tell her that singing isn’t for her, which appears to be the phrase du jour. I think she also did a jaunty little Irish jig, which I have many a question about. Get her on Derry Girls, stat!
The last girl in the dogshit audition category didn’t even sing, but we’re led to believe she was crap ‘cos when she said she’d never sung in front of a crowd before, noted nonce Kyle Sandilands told her it was evident. She then walked out of the room with her mouth open, a moment which has stunning GIF potential. I would start Holy War for her, personally.
But then we had loads of folks who could actually belt out a hot little ditty without offending anyone, which is the point of Australian Idol. One lass sang a bloody emotional rendition of “Message To My Girl” by Split Enz that would’ve had Neil Finn screaming, crying and throwing up.
One guy slayed the house down boots Houston I’m deceased with a raw cover of Robyn‘s hot ‘n sexy “Dancing On My Own” and Amy Shark looked like she had reached Nirvana.
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What an enticing and delicious smorgasbord of singing talent!
Who are the Australian Idol judges in 2023?
As evident in the audition videos, the new judging panel will consist of Kyle Sandilands (vomit), Aussie singer-songwriter Amy Shark, Miss “All About That Bass” Meghan Trainor and Harry Connick Jr, a man whose name I only recognise because he was Grace Adler’s shithouse husband on Will & Grace. He also reminds me of Christmas, like some sort of bootleg Michael Bublé.
the judges we deserve!!!! 😭 #australianidol #australian #idol pic.twitter.com/ogGpW8dzPN
— Charlie Lewin (@charlewincomedy) September 28, 2022
Look, if we want to run through first impressions: the line-up is white. Startlingly caucasian, even. The judging panel truly gives the three Wonder White (derogatory) blokes on the latest season of The Bachelor a run for their money.
It’s also random. I’m no expert on casting celebrities to judge contestants’ singing abilities, but was there no one else in Australia to fang on the panel except for Kyle MF Sandilands? Show me this man’s singing credentials.
Also, might I add, the bloke was sacked from Australian Idol on Channel Ten after that fucking abhorrent lie detector incident. Why is he coming back for round two? Begone, you belligerent behemoth.
In saying all this, I do welcome the idea of Meghan Trainor giving singers touchdowns.
Who’s hosting Australian Idol?
Gone are the days when Osher Günsberg (then known as Andrew G) and James Mathison, the most dynamic duo since Guzman and Gomez, hosted Australian Idol.
I secretly wished Oshie would come back, given his prolific hosting career on both The Masked Singer and The Bachelor. Yes, they’re both Channel Ten shows and the Australian Idol reboot will be on Channel Seven, but can’t a girl dream?
Our gracious hosts for Australian Idol in 2023 will be Ricki-Lee Coulter and Scott Tweedie, who are both two adorable human beings.
In case your Australian Idol lore is rusty, Coulter came seventh place on the second season of the show back in 2004. She was also in Australia’s greatest girl group, The Young Divas, which is an earth-shattering feat in itself.
Now, Coulter is no stranger to hosting, nor presenting. She’s already joined Günsberg and Mathison on Australian Idol Seasons Six and Seven as a presenter and reporter, so doing it again in 2023 should be a walk in the park for the clever cookie.
She also hosted Season Nine of Australia’s Got Talent and in 2010, she was a full-time radio presenter for Sydney’s Nova 96.9 breakfast show with Merrick Watts and Scott Dooley. Dare I say it, those blokes are the absolute embodiment of “some guys” — in a nice way!
As much as I love Ricki-Lee Coulter, I’m gagging to see Scott Tweedie on our screens again. The bloke hosted the astoundingly brilliant kid’s show Prank Patrol, in which him and his ninjas helped children pull pranks on people. They don’t make shows like that anymore, I tell ya.
Tweedie has done a lot of work with Network Ten, hosting programs such as The Loop, Dancing with the Stars and The Amazing Race Australia 6. He also starred in an episode of Neighbours (RIP) as a man called Derek Meeps, which is surely one for the CV.
He yeeted off to America around the end of 2019 to host E! News and Pop of the Morning and now he’s comin’ back to Australia to work his magic on Australian Idol. As he should, I say.
Günsberg uploaded a really fucking cute video to Instagram in September, in which he passed on the Australian Idol hosting torch by spraying Tweedie with a fuck ton of hairspray — a nod to his iconic mane from the days of Idol yore.
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Also, are we peeping Oshie’s jaw in the vid? That shit could be used as a knife on MasterChef.
When will Australian Idol be airing in 2023?
The Australian Idol reboot will be coming to Channel 7 and 7Plus on January 30, 2023. Time to start doing some stretches so you can give a few touchdowns from the comfort of your own home.
