Dog Charcuterie Boards Are The Latest Trend And The World Has Officially Gone Barking Mad

The insane trend that is charcuterie has taken it to the extreme now, with dog-fking-charcuterie. Yes charcuterie boards for your DOGS…barkcuterie to be precise.

So what is barkcuterie? It’s a spread made up of dog-friendly snacks like dog biscuits, carrots, strawberries, eggs, salmon, banana and peanut butter or yoghurt dipping bowls.

Don’t get me wrong I’m all for a good charcuterie board, but isn’t the whole point of them to be aesthetically pleasing for the person chowing down on it? Firstly, don’t dogs see in black and white? So they wouldn’t exactly appreciate the effort that went into selecting the pawfect colour palette. And secondly, they don’t have hands, so how TF are they supposed to take a carrot stick and dunk it in some dip????

Look at this monstrosity. I don’t even want to know what the fur on the right is.

Ok this is low-key cute, but realistically how are the dogs supposed to eat it?

A good excuse to make a dog charcuterie board would be for your dog’s birthday, or even as an accompaniment to a regular ol’ human charcuterie board. Just because you’re feeling boujee with your triple brie and eggplant dip, doesn’t mean your dog should also miss out.

But my question is, what about charcuterie for other animals? Cat charcuterie? Fish charcuterie? Horse charcuterie? When will it stop?

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, charcuterie is the future. It’s charcuterie’s world and we’re just living in it. Someone even made Christmas charcuterie chalets, that look like gingerbread houses.