New Study Finds People Who Use Emojis Are More Likely To Fucc, Love Heart Winky Face Tree

Well, there you have it folks. You’re more like to fucc if you send a bunch of emojis, according to a new study from The Kinsey Institute.

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They surveyed 5,000 participants, analysing frequency of emoji usage and whether “signalling affect” via emojis led to greater emotional and sexual connection.

Surprisingly, they found a correlation between emoji usage and the likelihood to boom boom. Additionally, their findings suggest that emojis help to maintain a connection beyond the first date.

They elaborate in their abstract: “Our findings suggest that emoji use with potential partners is associated with maintaining connection beyond the first date, and more romantic and sexual interactions over the previous year.”

“This research provides evidence that emojis convey important affective information to potential partners, and are potentially associated with more successful intimate connection.”

I initially found these results troubling – I mean, the overuse of emojis is a sure-fire way of killing a boner, in my opinion, and I don’t like the idea of encouraging people to use use them in excess without irony. It kills the vibe immediately.

However, after Nancy Drew-ing some more, I found that 86.8% of the 5,000 participants identified as straight… This makes a lot more sense – gays know how to use emojis correctly. Facts.

Either way, I don’t want a bunch of eggplant or devil emojis from a potential suitor, nor do I want a conversation in story reacts and winks.

You know what makes me horny? Punctuation, correct spelling, a mutual love for Hilary Duff and the proper use of ‘your/you’re’. Oooft….*heart eyes*