The Montague St Bridge Salutes The Boys By Cracking Open An Ice Cold Van

By

Cam Tyeson

Published

It might be Friday afternoon those of us working office jobs might be enjoying an extremely cheeky knock-off froth or two, always remember that the bastard Montague Street Bridge does not sleep, does not observe weekends, and is always clocked on… to kill.
Despite the expensive and repeated efforts to keep the public safe from the gaping, famished maw of the beast, a poor soul has fallen into the ghastly trap and sadly lost its head.
At approximately 3:00pm this afternoon, a single rented moving van suffered severe canopy injuries after it ventured too close to the snarling mesh of teeth, asphalt, and cross-beams.
The truck barely stood a chance as horrified on-lookers averted their gaze from the horrific scene; the bridge’s jaws gnarling and gnashing as it mercilessly ripped metal flesh from the top of the truck without care for the traumatic impact the scene may have on the common folk.
It’s sickening. It’s truly horrifying. It cannot be stopped.

Worse still, the unyielding Beelzebub of South Melbourne saw fit to taunt the commoners after consuming its latest innocent vehicle soul, proclaiming boldly that despite everyone’s best efforts, its reign of terror continues unabated.

My god. We are staring at the ungodly face of the great beyond. And it is staring directly back at us.


Source: The Age.
Photo: Tom Kelly/Twitter.

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