It’s not unusual for A Current Affair to focus on a fear of crime in Australia’s suburbs, but last night’s broadcast was special for its focus on a self-styled Melbourne militia – and one of its nunchuck-wielding members.
Reporting from Cranbourne, a semi-rural suburb in south-east Melbourne, Reid Butler met two men who apparently believe a spike in crime necessitates a weaponised neighbourhood watch.
A man identified as Joe said a spate of burglaries in the area had encouraged him to arm himself with knuckle dusters, steel pipes, and a compound bow more than powerful enough to kill any potential intruder.
Somewhat alarmingly, Joe said he now dips his bow tips in mercury, with the intention of poisoning his targets. His desire for vigilante justice also provoked an allusion to kidnapping – and worse.
“I’ll tie them up and I’ll take them them to somewhere where I know I’ll be on me own with them for a while,” Joe said. “And I’ll have a good discussion with them. And there’s no guarantees that they’re gonna come back.”
Joining Joe on his evening patrols is his neighbour, referred to as James. While his desire for retribution seems no less genuine, his methods seem… Well. Look for yourself.
James, who said he armed himself after having a puppy stolen from his property in recent months, displayed his fearsome nunchaku skills for the ACA cameras.
Thankfully, the program decided it was in the public interest for all would-be criminals to cop an eyeful of his work before daring to step foot on his property.
“I’m angry, so I might look pretty good at it, but, you know,” James said.
“It’s funny, because I wanted to get a job originally in the movie industry and stuff. So I always practiced stuff like that.”
The Victorian Crime Statistics Agency notes that the local government division of Casey, which contains Cranbourne, recorded 16,322 criminal incidents in 2017. That’s a rate of roughly 5,250 per 100,000 people.
While that number has steadily climbed in recent years due to Melbourne’s population growth and concurrent suburban sprawl, Casey’s crime rate is significantly lower than the state average of 6,352 per 100,000 people.
Overall, the state average also experienced a dip of 6.2% from 2016 to 2017.
The agency does not currently have information regarding crimes averted by flailing wooden batons.
You can watch the full report HERE.
