What On This Bronze Earth Is Going On With The Golden Globes, And What Does It All Fkn Mean

golden globes hfpa

Ahh, the good old Golden Globes. Except they’re not very good, and they’re not very golden as of late. Some shit is going down in Golden Globes town, and it is my duty to explain to you what the hell is happening, and why some people are praising Tom Cruise (which never fkn happens).

Alright, let’s get to explaining this mess in the most efficient and simple way possible, because there’s a lot of technical things to get bogged down in, but who has time for all that? For explainer purposes I’m gonna lay it all down in chronological order for you, so things make a lot more sense.

Feb 21: LA Times Kicks The HFPA’s Ass

The LA Times release an expose that absolutely shatters the Hollywood Foreign Press Association (HFPA), the folks who put on the Golden Globes.

In it, they allege that the HFPA is corrupt, dishonest, and has a real lack of Black board members. And when I say lack I mean zero. They had zero.

There was also a couple of lines in there about shady financial practices, so as you could imagine, things weren’t looking good. This was all before this year’s Golden Globes too, which saw a 60% drop in viewership. Can I get a yikes?

May 4: The HFPA Swear They Can Change, Baby, Don’t Leave Me, I Can Be A Better Man

The HFPA announce they aren’t #toxic with a roadmap that vows to improve upon diversity and change the very face of the board.

The HFPA has always had 90 members, but in their announcement, they promise to add 20 members who are POC. (Actually, they say they will have a stronger focus on hiring POC members, which means they can just as well hire a few more white people in that mix.)

They also promise to remove the requirement for employees to live in southern California, which opens up a whole heap of possibilities for future employees.

In the announcement, they say they aim to “develop a comprehensive and long-term strategy for the recruitment of racially diverse journalists”.

We’ll just have to see the plan will actually play out now.

Four days later, Netflix, which is officially done with the drama, promise to cease doing things with the HFPA.

May 11: Tom Cruise Hands His Globes Back

Tom Cruise, actor and Scientologist, hands three of his Golden Globes back to the HFPA.

The awards reportedly arrive in a box at the HFPA’s front door (très dramatic), and are a sign that even Cruise isn’t standing for the claims of racism being made towards the HFPA.

Let’s be clear though, he still isn’t worth celebrating over this.

May 11 Again: NBC Fuck Up The Golden Globes’ Entire Life

And just like that, NBC pulls the Golden Globes from being aired in 2022. This is a big deal for both parties, as most people clamour to NBC purely for the Globes, and obviously, the Globes benefit a whole heap from being aired on the NBC.

“We continue to believe that the HFPA is committed to meaningful reform,” a statement from the NBC read.

“However, change of this magnitude takes time and work, and we feel strongly that the HFPA needs time to do it right. As such, NBC will not air the 2022 Golden Globes. Assuming the organisation executes on its plan, we are hopeful we will be in a position to air the show in January 2023.”


So, will this mark the end of award shows as we know them? Possibly. The NBC pulling the Golden Globes is a huge step in the right direction, but it also begs the question, who really cares?

Most of the time people just want to see stunning carpet looks and the awards list, but not the actual show itself, which is often pretty fkn boring.

I guess all we can do is wait to see what happens next.