Over the past few days, there have been widespread reports of an altercation in a Sydney restaurant between rich dicks John Singleton and Jack Cowin, when photos emerged of the former apparently attempting to cut the latter up with a broken wineglass.
In the completely and utterly hilarious media circus that followed, various explanations were offered, one of the more popular ones being that Singleton lashed out after Cowin hung shit on him for drinking wine instead of beer.
The former’s son Jack Singleton has now stepped into the fray, offering yet another explanation for the tussle: the age-old debate as to whether wrestling is real or fake.
He reckons it all started following a discussion with footballer-turned-wrestler Colin Scotts.
“We were talking about wrestling with [Colin] and Dad was saying it was all fake. But Jack Cowin was a champion wrestler at his college in London, Ontario, and he was adamant that there was nothing fake about the sport,” Jack said.
“Suddenly Dad got up and said something like ‘so about as fake as a fake glassing’. Yes, it was a silly thing to do, but I can promise you it was only ever meant to be a joke.”
So there you have it. Pro-wrestling: tearing friendships apart since about grade eight.
“The police inquiry will show that there was a few blokes, good mates, having a really good time,” John Singleton later told 2GB’s Ben Fordman, despairing that a billionaire can no longer straight-up attempt to glass another billionaire in a very public place at lunchtime without it turning into a whole thing.