Ahh, there’s just nothing quite like seeing two of your favourite celestial bodies suddenly come into each other’s orbit in new and thrilling ways.
I’m talking about celebrities chattin’ each other up on Twitter, y’all, and it is in the Top 5 Things That The Internet Has Given Humanity.
Today’s edition of vicarious tuning: John Mayer vs. Nicki Minaj.
It started with an idle tweet from the perpetually horny Mr Mayer, in all likelihood sent from the toilet:
I spend an inordinate amount of time per day wondering if Nicki Minaj would like me or not.
— John Mayer (@JohnMayer) September 8, 2017
He could not possibly know how thoroughly his life would change thanks to these 90 characters typed atop the porcelain throne.
Because lo, someone has been searching her own name:
Would my body be your wonderland? https://t.co/jKpRdnhzbD
— Nicki Minaj (@NICKIMINAJ) September 8, 2017
Poor bloke. He didn’t stand a chance.
Please hold, losing my shit. This isn’t my reply yet.
— John Mayer (@JohnMayer) September 8, 2017
This is the shit the internet LIVES. FOR. People noticed. They noticed immediately.
https://twitter.com/milasquestions/status/906299732556963840
Narrator: he did.
— Snap’ja Wilson🖤🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇺🇦 (@snapwilson) September 8, 2017
Add a little bit of flirty backpedalling from the Minaj camp:
Asking for a friend 😅
— Nicki Minaj (@NICKIMINAJ) September 8, 2017
And you’ve got a Twitter explosion on your hands.
https://twitter.com/JunesMyx/status/906299628471177219
— Nickis 🍫 Babe (@JaylaAmoure) September 8, 2017
https://twitter.com/GabiFaberlle/status/906300933553971201
— Blaire (@BlaireBitchproj) September 8, 2017
https://twitter.com/NLiddle16/status/906299262677516294
What is going on here? pic.twitter.com/wnE0Iy2vwE
— Love, Kenny (@itskennday) September 8, 2017
Of course, someone was quick to bring up Mayer’s history of, uh, iffy statements about his sexual preferences…
https://twitter.com/ira/status/906340301228277760
https://twitter.com/steenfox/status/906359722407628800
…and there’s always at least one sceptic in the bunch:
https://twitter.com/___Monte_/status/906299964711510017
But on the whole, this is still quality internet for a Saturday evening. Bravo, Minaj and Mayer. We desperately hope you guys actually hook up.
