
Finally, after what seems like 84 years, the powers that be have given us the MAFS moment we’ve all been fanging for: Duncan dumping Alyssa at the final vows.
Peace has been restored. My skin has cleared. My dead plants have come back to life. Life is good.
Alyssa got the ball rolling by telling Duncan she wanted to help him grow and change, and also that she wanted to fight for their relationship.
The gal wasn’t ready to give up but, sadly, the good people of Twitter had already thrown their towel in the ring. They were done. Stick a fork in them.
LOL Alyssa thinks DUNCAN needs to change? Oh honey, no. #MAFS #MAFSAU
— SoManyEarrings@aus.social (@SoManyEarrings) March 26, 2023
alyssa “wanting to help duncan grow” i have to laugh… #MAFS #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/drUWphHEI8
— alysha is playing totk (@venomhaven) March 26, 2023
Duncan needs to grow does he Alyssa? pic.twitter.com/Q5jwK8sRg4
— TV 🦄🍄Junkie (@ammestar) March 26, 2023
I’m not ready to give up.. I want to fight for our relationship…. Every second weekend and maybe Wednesdays. #mafs #mafsau
— MAFSCommentary (@MafsCommentary) March 26, 2023
oh dear lord she wants to help him #mafs
— Ella Gawchan (@EllaGawchan) March 26, 2023
“I wanna fight for our relationship…” #mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/lCt0u4puJO
— Ira Snave (@IraSnave) March 26, 2023
It would also appear that Duncan was well and truly over it ‘cos after Alyssa finished delivering her thoughts and feelings, he replied: “Thank you for your words.”
I screamed. That’s absolutely what you say to someone who gave a mid eulogy at the funeral of a family member who everyone secretly despised.
Folks knew exactly what was about to transpire after Duncan uttered those five words. And they were frothing it.
“Thank you for your words” that’s a man just about to rip a girl’s heart out #MAFS #MAFSAU
— Melanie Bracewell (@meladoodle) March 26, 2023
*stiff ass smile when he sees her* “thankyou for your words” *awkward ass hug* oh hes done with her fr #MAFSAU
— evan 🪿 71 (@ginaninas) March 26, 2023
“Thank you for your words” Offttt. #MAFSAU #MAFS #MAFSAustralia
— Jessica (@vdaze) March 26, 2023
“Thank you for your words!” BURN!!! #MAFSAU pic.twitter.com/0zKqYeHQ0o
— Myles Davies (@mylesdavies) March 26, 2023
YESSSSSSS DUNCAN #MAFSAU #MAFS pic.twitter.com/i1LsUiSM2w
— Stacey❤💙🏆 (@_Stacey1987) March 26, 2023
As a side note, Twitter thought the whole forest dumping situation felt like yet another instalment of The Blair Witch Project. Equally as spooky, but without the death, supernatural horror, amateur filmmaking and so on and so forth.
this ceremony, or maybe just alyssa, is giving blair witch #mafsau #mafs
— eurovision opinions (@mafs_opinions) March 26, 2023
Imagine getting dumped in the woods? I’d go all Blair Witch. #mafs #mafsau
— Ira Snave (@IraSnave) March 26, 2023
Duncan delivered The Dump™ (of Alyssa, not a poo) and the girl started crying. As you would, if you just got rejected on national television by objectively the hottest man to ever appear on any Australian reality dating show.
With a completely straight face, Duncan offered her a tissue and everyone agreed that the comedic timing was superb. Impeccable. Someone get this man his own Netflix comedy special immediately.
Duncan: Do you want a tissue?
Me…#MAFSAU #MAFS pic.twitter.com/gB9GQ8Dvoz
— so tired (Taylor’s Version) (@pjk27779) March 26, 2023
Duncan right now.#mafs #mafsau pic.twitter.com/kAG0EdDMh9
— MAFSCommentary (@MafsCommentary) March 26, 2023
Hahahahaha DO YOU WANT A TISSUE!! 😂😂😂😂#MAFSAU
— Penny B (@PennyPingWing) March 26, 2023
Some folks were even putting their tissues out for Alyssa in solidarity. Gone but not forgotten.
Put your tissues out for Alyssa #MAFSAU #MAFS pic.twitter.com/xs5j0xxxLI
— Sarah L (@lawzy11) March 26, 2023
Put your Tissue boxes out for Alyssa…. pic.twitter.com/epO6DMlItW
— TV 🦄🍄Junkie (@ammestar) March 26, 2023
After rejecting a snot rag, Alyssa stormed off into the forest and declared that Duncan was looking for a princess.
“But I’m not a princess. I’m a queen,” she announced, which absolutely sounds like something that Camilla, Queen Consort said to King Charles before ol’ mate Liz carked it.
Folks agreed that it was deeply funny, and even a little bit iconic. Someone also get Alyssa her own Netflix comedy special ASAP.
Alyssa – ‘I’m not a princess I’m a queen’ #MAFSAU #MAFS pic.twitter.com/A066xugBuM
— Brad (@bradfogarty101) March 26, 2023
“I’m not a princess. I’m a queen”.
I just spat water everywhere.
Alyssa is a comedian. #mafs #mafsau
— Nez (@fraggle73) March 26, 2023
Omg Alyssa thinking she’s a queen… #MAFS pic.twitter.com/RbwF0vMiEw
— DeluxeStormBorn™ (@deluxe_tm) March 26, 2023
https://twitter.com/prissla_/status/1639924412005888000
More final vows tomorrow night! Can’t wait! But first, you must read our recap on tonight’s proceedings.
If you’re still chomping at the bit for MAFS-related gossip, you can sign up to our newsletter here or give our podcast We’ve Done The MAFS (hehe) a listen.