The fact that it was released over three years ago and yet still commands a massive player base really is a testament to how freaking good ‘Grand Theft Auto V‘ really is.
‘GTA Online‘ has been constantly updated by Rockstar Games, who continue to pump out more expansions and content, turning the online mode of the game into an infinitely replayable joy.
It’s also a nightmarish wasteland filled with dickheads whose sole purpose for playing the game is to blow your shit up. Los Santos is hell, y’all.
As great as tear-arsing across the Grand Senora Desert in your outrageously souped-up BF Bifta while blasting Channel X is – and, truly, it’s a good time – rolling around the corner towards your Vinewood garage only to find that the entire block has been turned into a shooting gallery and you are now naught but a tin cut-out of a duck is a right pain in the Sprunk.
Luckily, if you’re crafty enough, there’s ways to get your own back.
A Twitter user by the name of Aaron Reynolds, who by his own admission is both 42 years old and not very good at the game, successfully pulled off what could rank as one of the great singular trollings in GTA Online history.
Figuring out the fact that if a player blows up or destroys another player’s insured in-game car they have to pay through the teeth for it, Reynolds set about the task of constructing a car so outrageously expensive that it would financially cripple any player who so much as breathes on it. The dreaded GURNTMOBILE.
So I made a car so pointlessly, ridiculously customized that it is worth over a million dollars in the game. The Gurntmobile. #o1mdc pic.twitter.com/7X2JpxUWTc
— Aaron Reynolds (@aaronreynolds) January 17, 2017
The plan itself is devilishly simple: Take the expensive car, and put it in the path of chaos. A trojan horse rolling through the middle of downtown Los Santos.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you that fucking with people isn’t an art-form, because it 100% is. And this bloke is a natural talent.
But it gets better. On night two of passively terrorising teenagers, Reynolds figured out that once players start to recognise the car, the jig is up. So what do you do then? Build another, even more ridiculously expensive car, and start the whole process over again.
Thus, Gurntmobile 2 was born. She’s a beauty. #o1mdc pic.twitter.com/HS4Xl8IstG
— Aaron Reynolds (@aaronreynolds) January 18, 2017
Sweet jesus it’s beautiful. And expensive. Needlessly, agonisingly expensive.
The plan worked magnificently once again. A little too well, as it turned out, because the money-sapping drove other players to the point where they tried to pay Reynolds a little in-game visit to… uh… I don’t know, to be honest.
But it somehow gets better. Because the insane world of GTA Online is a constantly evolving beast, people quickly found glaring weaknesses in Reynolds’ game.
Again, he admits freely, he’s not a very good player, and this particularly applies to his driving skills. Exploiting that weakness, other players began lumping wanted levels on him, from which he could not escape.
Say what you want about the idiot mob who frequents Los Santos on the reg, but they’re nothing if not resourceful.
Me? I just stick to stunt races. No jerks with homing missiles to be found there.
Source: Twitter.
Photo: Twitter.
