By virtue of the fact that Australia is, well, Australia, it should be pretty impossible for it to be more Australia than it already is – it sure seems like it’s fuckin’ trying though.
Take, for instance, this delightful story about swimmers in Sydney who yesterday morning found themselves in a pool with a goddamn shark.
Local resident Jennifer Hill told the BBC that she was having a lovely bit of a swim in the ocean baths at Palm Beach yesterday when another swimmer her alerted her to the fact that she was not alone:
“One of the other regular swimmers was just about to get in, and he looked down and looked up, and said, ‘there’s a shark.’”“That little shark managed to hide herself from everybody.”
I can’t decide what’s funnier about this: someone alerting you to the presence of a shark by just saying ‘There’s a shark‘, or the fact that I realised I had super sexistly assumed that the shark was a boy because to me all sharks are boys. Probably the first one.
The shark (which I shall hereon refer to as “Fins McFuck“) was a three-foot dusky whaler that would probably only be harmful to you if you brought your goldfish to swim with you and you were very attached to the goldfish.
The pool was closed until the shark could be rescued. Kerrie McDonald from Manly Sea Life Sanctuary confirmed the shark was not a threat:
“She definitely wouldn’t have been a risk to the swimmers, but they are very strong capable predators once fully grown.”
Photographer Rita Kluge snapped a pic of Fins McFuck that has now convinced me that sharks are adorable actually and we shouldn’t at all be scared of them:
Hope Nugent, also from Manly Sea Life, told Channel 10 that the shark probably snuck in with the tide:
“We don’t know how it ended up in the pool, but there have been high tides and sometimes they come in on the high tide.“You do tend to get other animals, such as stingrays, but it’s quite infrequent for sharks to get caught in there.”
What a time to be alive. Godspeed You! Fins McFuck.
Source: BBC.
Photo: Jennifer Hill.
