It’s nearly the last Saturday in September, which can only mean one thing. Footy Christmas. The GF. The Granny. The Big Dance. And as is custom for dyed-in-the-wool fans of the two teams battling it out, houses aplenty are being decorated for the big day. This year, the Melbourne Demons are doing battle with the Western Bulldogs, and considering both of their fanbases, I’m sure you can imagine how the decorations are going.

Shades of blue, white, red, and – ahem – navy blue, are slowly seeping onto social media as large parts of Melbourne are being painted with the two teams’ colours. Everything from painted fence palings to fucking expensive-looking heavy duty banners are popping up, so let’s take a moment to enjoy – and quietly recognise the difference between – the efforts put in by Demons and Doggies fans.

In the west (both physically and spiritually) there’s houses painted in the tri-colours, street art celebrating the best mullet in the league (hi Bailey Smith), and plenty of placards and pups.

And then there’s this frankly terrifying balloon version of Marcus Bontempelli.

On the other side of town – again, physically and spiritually – Melbourne Demons fans are really showing their MCC memberships with their decorating skills.

I mean Dees fans are also the same types who take charcuterie boards into the members area of the MCG, so we can’t be too surprised they’re going all out for their club’s first grand final in 21 years, right?

And if you thought the Dees escaped having an inflated paralysis demon made up for them? Think again.

That’s the most alarming Max Gawn I think I’ve ever seen.

Whatever way the game goes over at Optus Stadium in Perth on Saturday night, I think we can all agree that there’s one thing us Melburnians will be doing with our four hours of allocated recreational time this weekend. And that’s simply going for a walk to have a sticky beak at all the big decorations and feel the electric hum course through our veins that only Footy Christmas can bring.

Image: Instagram / @dogs_and_dees / @housewraps