Every now and then, you come across something on the internet that defies your expectations, mental capacity and belief systems.
Before Sittin On Tha Toilet, I didn’t know watching a woman say those same words over and over again could be so entertaining.
Before Buzzfeed, I couldn’t fathom the sheer quantity of seperate, totally unrelated entities that could be Reimagined As Disney Princesses.
Before Instagram, I didn’t realise how unacceptable the lack of gap between my thighs was.
But nothing compares to the mind-blowing mental dexterity required to take in the following sex toy invention we, PEDESTRIAN.TV, discovered on the internet today.
Introducing… The CyberSkin Twerking Butt Deluxe Realistic Vagina and Ass Sex Machine.
The CyberSkin Twerking Butt Deluxe Realistic Vagina and Ass Sex Machine is a $999 arsehole and vag model that genuinely fucking twerks. As the website reads:
“Blow your wad on this deluxe, app-compatible vagina and ass, a life-size and lifelike butt that goes the extra Miley with its realistic twerking motion, plus a magical mix of self-heating twin canals and multispeed vibration and massage.Sex toy realism gets a shot in the arm as the curved and weighty butt warms its internal canals to body temperature for an amazingly authentic experience.”
You can even hook it up to your music and watch the frighteningly lifelike bottom twerk to Jon Sudano, if you wanted.
It cums complete with lubricant, renew powder, a cleaning hose and storage bag for easy use and simple clean-up and aftercare. I strongly, strongly, strongly suggest watching this video of the butt in action.
Finally, as if this story could not possibly get better, I present to you the one and only review left for the product on the site.
Welcome to the real world, kids.
Photo: MTV.
