Twitter Deployed Some Very Hot Takes On The Depp & Heard ‘Apology’

Before you do anything else: if you’ve not yet watched the video of Johnny Depp sweating out pure contempt as he bitterly works his way through a biosecurity infomercial he was forced to do in a deal with the devil (Barnaby Joyce), oh my God, you absolutely have to.

It’s difficult to imagine anything funnier than just the thought of the perpetually red-faced and wild-eyed Joyce existing on the same planet as the luxuriously be-scarved and softly spoken Depp, but it turns out having the former force the latter to make a horrible deadpan video on his laptop so that his dogs don’t get killed is even more hilarious.

As per usual, Australian Twitter used their disgustingly wasted talents to completely tear apart this ridiculous set of circumstances, and we get to reap the benefits, enjoy:

depp: your deputy pm is g.. good – no one’s buying this
joyce: STICK TO THE SCRIPT!
depp: and he doesnt remind me of augustus gloop at all

— colley (@JamColley) April 18, 2016

I know this Johnny Depp #waronterrier is funny and all, but let’s not forget those are real dogs that Barnaby Joyce personally strangled.

— Adam Liaw (@adamliaw) April 18, 2016

Depp: …*sighs*…furthermore, your Deputy Prime Minister is a handsome man and I would turn gay for him.
Barnaby: more

— Peter Taggart (@petertaggart) April 18, 2016

if you are watching this we are already dead. barnaby joyce….he wasn’t joking

— Bec Shaw (@Brocklesnitch) April 18, 2016

Barnaby Joyce, in his director’s jodhpurs, demanding another take from Jonny Depp and Amber Heard

— Rob Stott (@Rob_Stott) April 18, 2016

pic.twitter.com/1QGcez266n

— neo-bort (@bortofdarkness) April 18, 2016

the sentence is carried out. johnny depp has been killed. he is survived by his two dogs, which have also been killed

— fungbunger (@parsfarce) April 18, 2016

It truly is incredible just how much Australia comes together when a very odd politician threatens to kill a Hollywood actor’s dogs.