As students of the art of the humble-brag, we’re all too familiar with the post-drug-bust press conference image of smarmy police officers flanking a cheap plastic table adorned with all of the drugs. But we doubt you’ve seen one like this:
CSI: Fruity Lexia.
Last week, some eagle-eyed cops in Townsville saved the public from themselves (and killer hangovers) by seizing over 60 goon bags filled with illicit homemade alcohol hidden in large plastic buckets located on the side of a boat ramp.
Per a press release from the Townsville Police department: “At approximately 10:30pm on Friday, November 28, Police received an anonymous phone call stating there were numerous large sized plastic buckets containing cask wine bags at the side of the Forrest Beach Boat Ramp. Police attended the location and observed a female person sitting on the side of the boat ramp. As Police approached the female person they observed 6 x large plastic buckets containing numerous cask wine bags in each bucket. Whilst speaking with the female person police observed a tinnie approximately 50m off shore from the boat ramp. Due to the distance and lack of lighting Police were unable to identify what make, model or registration of the boat. Police were also unable to identify the person/s on board. Police seized the buckets and a total of 63 bags of cask wine and investigations are continuing.”
The puffy, gilded emblem of the worst hangover ever was alleged to have contained “sly-grog”, an Australian colloquialism for poor quality moonshine, a significant problem in the area.
Serious question though: how much worse than cask wine can something brewed in some dude’s bathtub be?
