One Nation Goon Endures All-Time Cringeworthiest Interview Over A Sex Shop

In the annals of Australian political history, there are a handful of truly beautiful moments caught on film wherein a political candidate’s chances of election vanish practically before your eyes: John Hewson trying to explain the price of a birthday cake. Jaymes Diaz making it precisely one-sixth of the way through his party’s 6-point “stop the boats” plan. To that, we introduce you to One Nation hopeful, Mark Thornton.

Thornton is the One Nation candidate for the seat of Thuringowa up in outer Townsville, and is seeking the vote in the upcoming Queensland state election.

As part of a One Nation campaigning blitz around the city, Thornton, along with Pauline Hanson, fronted media earlier this afternoon. There, 7 News reporter Ben Murphy confronted Thornton about a sex shop he owns – Cupids Cabin – that has made some extremely questionable posts to social media, including one that asserted “good sex should be in the gray [sic] area between ‘tickle fight’ and domestic violence.”

Oh boy, did the fun ever begin there.

Be forewarned, this is *excruciating*.

Christ on a bike, what’s better? The fact that old mate tries to bat away the domestic violence quip with the magnificent half-sentence, “That probably comes back to your 50 Shades of Grey type…” or the fact that Hanson somehow had ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA about any of this beforehand.

Actually upon reflection, it’s the extremely vexed woman in the background clutching her pearls progressively tighter.

What on earth is One Nation’s vetting process for candidates, and how do they continually manage to dig up these spuds.

It’s just… the whole thing is… I mean it’s…

There’s only one way to describe it, mates:

*kissy fingers*