People have been decrying Barbie – and to a lesser extent, her nice guy boyfriend Ken – for setting unrealistic body standards for the better part of three decades. Barbie is too skinny! they said. Barbie’s eyes are disproportionate to her face! they cried. If Barbie was a real-life human, she would only have room in her teeny tiny torso for half a stomach and just one of her kidneys!
Well, we’re pleased to inform you today that Mattel has heard your cries and given Ken a man bun.
Alright, so the man bun isn’t the only new feature to land on Ken’s head. Mattel has today introduced a range of new Barbies and Kens to represent different body types, races, and general life interests.
You’ve got cornrowed Ken, freckled Ken, “a Ryan Seacrest type” Ken.
This answer is also acceptable:
They just released a power bottom twink ken and I’m all about it pic.twitter.com/LUZtLdzqC9
— MacDoesIt (@Machaizelli) June 20, 2017
Then there’s Barbie: full afro Barbie, Latina Barbie, spent too much time on Instagram and now rocks turquoise hair Barbie.
But in all seriousness, @Barbie finally has dolls that more than one type of child can relate to and that is amazing. pic.twitter.com/paUG1EGgcf
— Emily A. Cummins (@emilyacummins) June 20, 2017
One time Amanda & I spent 2+ hours on the phone sending each other pics of the dolls and sets we had as kids. She would’ve loooved this one pic.twitter.com/8pWVbYOvzI
— Emily A. Cummins (@emilyacummins) June 20, 2017
But when all’s said and done, it’s man bun Ken that’s really setting people off.
Man-bun Ken doll just interrupted me to tell me that Bernie would have won. pic.twitter.com/Mnu8pAXV7F
— summer goth (@NicCageMatch) June 20, 2017
New Ken doll has a man-bun. Climbing back into bed. pic.twitter.com/AiuPUxS7hM
— Zach Braff (@zachbraff) June 20, 2017
daughter: mommy, will i grow up and find true love
me: here, this is man bun Ken. he’s way into aligning chakras and makes his own kombucha pic.twitter.com/X9jSmMw83R
— beth can’t with this (@bourgeoisalien) June 20, 2017
Does man bun Ken doll also come with a Soul Cycle membership, vintage record player, and $50,000 in student loan debt? pic.twitter.com/ulEwGSxxb1
— Emily Jashinsky (@emilyjashinsky) June 20, 2017
The new “Man Bun” Ken doll comes with shirt, shoes, and keys to Barbie’s car that he’s driving until he “gets back on his feet again.” pic.twitter.com/gYmXwR9WEc
— Benjamin Siemon (@BenjaminJS) June 20, 2017
Clearly, there’s only one solution here: find the scissors and go to goddamn town.
