Julie Bishop Holding The #Girlboss Barbie Made In Her Honour Is Your New Sleep Paralysis Demon

Good morning friends. I’m sorry to have to do this to you, but today we’ll be talking about Julie Bishop and her cursed new Barbie doll. I have peered through the gates of Hell and this is what I have seen, and so now it’s only right that I share this dreaded content with you.

Nothing says ‘girlboss, gaslight, gatekeep’ more than Julie Bishop, and nothing is better at immortalising girlbosses than Barbie dolls. And by the way, when I say Barbie dolls in this context, I mean official Mattel brand Barbie dolls, not cheap knock-offs.

Bishop announced on Wednesday that Mattel had approached her to be their ‘2021 Australian role model of the year’, and naturally, she accepted in an instant. I mean, if someone wanted to make a doll of me I’d absolutely accept. Narcissists dream and all. Pending that the doll was, y’know… not lifesize.

She showcased her very own doll (and others in her collection) on Nine’s Today Show, and the images of her with mini-her are absolutely sending me.

“I have been a fan of Barbie since I was a very little girl, and Barbie asked me this year if I would accept this honour and I was just delighted,” Bishop told the Today Show.

“I hope it will encourage young women and girls to aspire to set big goals, work hard to achieve them and be leaders in their field.”

If you’d like a closer look at the doll, then here you go.

Honestly, you have to appreciate the hustle. Like her or not, Bishop is an icon of Aussie politics.

Barbie has noted Bishop as a “glass-ceiling-shattering icon” for being the first woman to serve as Foreign Affairs Minister, and you have to admit, they have a point there.

Now for more cursed pics of Bishop and the dolls.

Bishop’s doll comes with an Aussie passport, a silver suitcase, the classic blonde hair, and is wearing the same look that she did on the day she resigned from her job as Foreign Affairs Minister.

The doll also comes with a trademark set of Bishop’s dangly earrings. Iconic.

I mean, look at how excited she is to hold her demon children. Who are we to circumvent this unabashed joy?

If you need me I’m going to be forming a list of iconic things I need to do before I eventually get a Barbie at 64.