Pregnancy and hangovers have something in common other than morning sickness: they both deliver some pretty cooked cravings.
I’m not familiar on the with-child scenario (that I’m aware of), but I do know a hangover better than I know my own mother. My go-to – other than litres of water, incessant teeth-brushing and crying on the tiles of a bathroom floor – is pizza.
That dish is actual life, people. It can satisfy every diverse, edible need you may have, and it also doesn’t take much of a good-looking fridge shelf to get the job done.
OK, let’s be honest, you don’t need to be preggers or filthy hung to be obsessed with this well-rounded offering.
I mean, is there really another solution where you can look at your grocery shop scraps and go, “Let’s just fang it all on a pizza ey“?
Yeah, nah. Pls yeast your eyes on the below A+ concoctions for next time you just can’t decide what to get in / around your mouth. It’s an ingredient jungle out there and we could all do with a little mouth-watering direction when we’re feeling fragile as it is.
Cheeseburger. On a pizza. MAKES SENSE. Less bread, more of the good stuff.
POTATO GEM PIZZA
Potato on pizza is as questionable as pineapple on pizza at times (don’t kill me), but not in the case of potato gems (or tater tots, if you will). We’ll never say no to teeny tiny hash browns on a pizza base, and once ya’ try it, you won’t either.
Sometimes we just need to feel minimally better about our life choices. Sometimes salad can do that for us, even if it is sitting nicely on a big carb plate. Baby steps, right? This is one of the pizzas on the menu at Fratelli Famous‘ new Sydney CBD Westfield store, which is perf for when you can’t be assed to do a grocery shop.
BACON & BANANA PIZZA
Some combos are so wrong they’re right, even if their toppings are about as contradictory as it gets. Make those bodies sing / oink (?)
WHY DON’T WE HAVE BOTH WHY DON’T WE HAVE BOTH WHY DON’T WE HAVE BOTH?
Oh shut up, we know there’s a big ol’ part of you that wants to give it a crack. Just think about that crystallised crunch, sweetie.
CHINESE FOOD PIZZA
Photo: Poor Couple’s Food Guide.
Because sometimes standard leftovers just don’t cut it.
HAHAHAHAHAHA. AMAZING. YES. Kinda peeved we didn’t think of it first.
PEANUT BUTTER + JELLY PIZZA
PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME.
Dessert pizza is where it’s at. Just add Nutella, icing sugar and bananas for a convenient AF take.
MAC + CHEESE PIZZA
Anything McDonald’s can do pizza can do better.
OK, if you can’t feel the yolk bursting and oozing into your mouth, you’re going to need a sensory reevaluation.
Extra salt, please. You can go in any direction with this bad boy depending on your condiment preference. We’re vibing an aioli on top ja feel?
Before you bitch n’ moan about the fact that you could’ve come up with something better than the above, please, grace us with you skills at the new Fratelli Famous Pizzeria in Sydney’s CBD. We’d like to see you try. They just opened (more info HERE) and let you make your own pizzas, ’cause they know full-well that you’re all’a bunch of weirdoughs.
Go on, slice up ya’ life and squirt that saliva like you’ve never squirted before.
Photo: Instagram / _eat_that.