You know what the most awkward thing in the world is? Having people sing ‘Happy Birthday‘ to you. Society doesn’t allow you to do anything except stand there and desperately try and force a smile as people stare at you intently like you just joined a cult.
Now imagine it was just one person doing it, and imagine the song they were singing was one they had written themselves and also it was about you. Now, additionally, imagine that the song is not very good. What I have just described is a pretty good working definition of a biblical Hell, and it’s what Cheryl experienced at the hands of Andrew this evening.
If you’re unfamiliar, Cheryl and Andrew are the ‘bad boy’ couple of ‘Married At First Sight‘, who forged a newer, sexier relationship together after Andrew’s pretend wife split in the dead of night and Cheryl’s pretend husband turned out to be an extremely intense and deeply bizarre Trump-supporting jerk.
Having not shared the deep and sacred bond that a couple normally experiences when they’re fake married for reality TV, Cheryl and Andrew have had to move into their relationship slightly more slowly, which is not sitting well with Andrew, who is apparently mad horny to make out.
Seemingly convinced that his extremely romantic (see above) gesture of serenading Cheryl with what appears to be a baritone ukelele, Andrew decided to awkwardly go in for the kiss. Either ignoring or unaware of her very clearly not-into-it body language, he pressed on, before abruptly being told that she did not want to kiss him.
This makes for some very uncomfortable viewing, and therefore great television. Please enjoy:
Source and photo: Channel 9.
