By the Gregorian Calendar, Neil deGrasse Tyson is now in the 57th year of his time here on Earth, and to celebrate, he’s tweeting #WhenIWasYourAge facts about science, life, and the absurdity of humanity. As you do.
A rant on #WhenIWasYourAge follows…
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Pluto was a planet. T-Rex dragged his tail. And the Brontosaurus was always chewing vegetation.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Photographs were records of your life experience, and not the life experience itself.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge A photograph lived inside your camera, cloaked in mystery for weeks, until you took exactly 35 more photos.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Milk was not yet the farthest thing from the front entrance to your grocery store.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge We consumed Twinkles, Cool Whip, and Yoo-hoo, without questioning their chemical composition.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Corn Pops Frosted Flakes & Honey Smacks were instead called Sugar Pops Sugar Frosted Flakes & Sugar Smacks
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge We had candy cigarettes, gun-shaped cigarette lighters, and sucked flavored sugar through a straw.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 5, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Extracting ketchup from its narrow-necked glass bottle occasionally made you question the laws of gravity.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge An ashtray was a time-honored gift you could bring to a person’s home.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Second-hand smoke was when somebody offered you a toke on whatever they were puffing.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge All hotel rooms smelled of cigarette smoke.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Partly sunny days were called partly cloudy.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Sauce was called Gravy.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge Rain Forests were called Jungles. And Wetlands were called Swamps.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
#WhenIWasYourAge We cured diseases and went to the Moon, benchmarking our usage of the word “Awesome.”
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) October 6, 2015
He’s still going, so play along HERE while he keeps dishing out the history trivia.
HAPPY DAY OF BIRTH, NEIL.
But a word of warning: don’t scroll too far down his Twitter feed if you want to enjoy The Martian; he’s legitimately spoiled it.
Picture: FOX via Getty Images.
