PEDESTRIAN.TV has partnered with 20th Century Fox to celebrate the release of Independence Day: Resurgence, in cinemas June 23. Original cast members Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman and Vivica A Fox, in addition to our home-grown Liam Hemsworth, are back to give our alien invaders a bit of a left-right-goodnight. The first instalment was the second biggest blockbuster of the ’90s, so the sequel is bound to be decent AF. Stay up to date with Independence Day: Resurgence’s action by getting around it on Facebook HERE.
The universe is BLOODY ‘UGEEEEEEEE.
Given this, it’s obviously only a matter of time before a smarter, more cunning species of life stumbles upon our blue marble to claim it as their own.
THEY’RE COMING, PEOPLE. WE’RE SCREWED. HALP.
Don’t worry, good people of the internet. We’ve got just the thing to quell any fears you may have RN or, y’know, constantly.
Adhere to the following tips ‘n tricks on surviving an alien invasion and you’ll be right as bloody rain.
BE BOY-SCOUT LEVEL PREPARED WITH A SURVIVAL KIT
What’s the best way of being prepared for an alien invasion? With an emergency survival kit, obviously.
You’ll want to keep your kit in something that’s easily transportable such as a couple of backpacks. It doesn’t matter if they’re Louis Vuitton or an $8 one you’ve picked up from Kmart – it’s your choice to remain fashurn AF during disaster periods if that’s what you’re all about.
Just ensure your backpack can hold the weight of your emergency kit + keep together when you’re inevitably running for your life.
It should include enough non-perishable food / a litre of water for everyone in your household.
Other things to include in the survival kit are:
- extra threads
- first aid kit
- torches
- can opener (for ya tinned goodies)
- a gas-burner or means to heat food
- emergency blankets
- paper maps of your area
- tent
There’s a whole heap of other stuff you could include, so check out the Red Cross’ website (yes, we’re serious) HERE.
PRETEND YOU’RE A HIPSTER VEGAN AND / OR ENVIRONMENTALIST
Some hardcore conspirators believe that aliens truly will “come in peace”, or at least, mostly in peace. Their belief is that the alien’s purpose wouldn’t be to conqueror us per se, rather they’d be more interested in saving us from our gluttonous, greedy and wasteful selves.
Bonafide alien expert Jim Moroney, in his book The Extraterrestrial Answer Book, says:
“Sustainable development will be the future of humanity… Human beings are part of the environment and we have the potential to live in harmony with it with minimal impact.”
Living green, Moroney proposes, will bolster the likelihood of alien invaders allowing you to evolve with them to achieve a joint consciousness and a better planet.
tfw you become 1 wid da alienz.
RUN LIKE YOU DAMN-WELL MEAN IT
So, the aliens have arrived. Are you going to sit on your butt and continue watching GoT? HELL NAH. Hopefully you’re in semi-decent shape / hit the gym regularly ’cause you’ll be needing to hit the pavement five minutes ago.
hot tip: be Goldblum-level shredded b4 attack.
If the advanced beings that’ve landed haven’t, or are yet, to let off an EMP (electro magnet pulse for the uninitiated) kinda situation that renders all technology useless, get yourself a tough car and put some distance between yourself / densely populated areas.
While getting out of the thick of it is vital to your survival, STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM LONG, DESOLATE ROADS.
ANOTHER PRO TIP: Stay the hell away from national monuments. Theorist believe that aliens go out of their way to destroy these sentimental structures (like The White House in Independence Day) to really get under humanity’s skin.
CBF getting stuck in the fall-out? Don’t go near ’em.
CONTINUE BEING A CLEVER COOKIE
Hollywood has many a lesson to share re: alien invasions if you care to pay attention. While on the run, try to brush up on flicks (such as: The Revenant, The Day After Tomorrow, Prometheus, The Day the Earth Stood Still) that have an element of alien insight, how to survive in the wilderness and – most importantly – getting through an alien invasion.
As you might have heard / seen / been extremely excited by, Independence Day is back with its second instalment, Independence Day: Resurgence. Check out the trailer below if you’ve missed it:
In short: THE FLIPPIN’ ALIENS ARE BACK. Thankfully, however, so are original cast members Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman and Vivica A Fox – backed by our boi Liam Hemsworth – to show ’em what for. Given how decent the last one was, we reckon the sequel is another classic in the making.
Be sure to check out Independence Day: Resurgence, in cinemas June 23, to continue your alien invasion education. Why? ‘Cause they’re coming, people. THEY’RE COMING.
Keep up with all things Independence Day by getting amongst them on Facebook HERE.
Photo: 21st Century Fox.
