Someone Nicked A Haunted Doll & Returned It With No Scalp, So They’re Obviously Cursed Now

Haunted Doll

It’s actually not often that Haunted Doll Content pops up, but of course it had to happen today when PEDESTRIAN.TV’s self-appointed Haunted Doll Editor, Mel, is off sick. It’s just terrible timing, so I really hope I can do this story justice.

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Coming to you from Waipu, New Zealand is this frankly horrifying tale about a 200-year-old porcelain predator named “Emma’s doll”, who was stolen from Waipu Museum on Monday. She was once owned by Emma McKay, who came to NZ from Canada in the 1800s.

Just look at her.

Waipu Museum manager Fiona Mohr told Newshub that the brazen robbery took place in broad daylight. “One of the volunteers was walking through [the museum] and noticed a lock of hair on the floor – it was like something out of a horror movie.”

The stand and glass case that Emma’s doll is usually kept in were both toppled over on the floor, with no sign of the cursed being anywhere. Some might call it “theft”, I call it “the possessed doll definitely walked out of the museum herself”. Each to their own though!

haunted doll
try to tell me this bitch didn’t toddle off on her own

The staff from the museum took to social media to plead for help in returning Emma’s doll to her rightful home, which just set commenters off once they copped a look at the thing. Many of them speculated that Emma’s doll would haunt her captors until their last breath, which is probably true. “Oh no what have they unleashed,” wrote one person, while another quipped: “Poor people that end up with this doll… take my chances with Chucky any day.”

Another FB follower said: “The doll will be contacting them before the museum does.” Which actually kind of came true, I shit you not.

Haunted doll

Basically, after a few days missing, Fiona says on Wednesday she got a “feeling” that the doll had been returned. When she looked in the museum’s letterbox, the bloody thing was there, wrapped in a bread bag and missing half its scalp.

Let’s unpack this for a moment, shall we? Firstly what was this “feeling”, I need to know more. Was it a premonition? A strange sudden compulsion to walk to the letterbox? Did she feel the power of Emma’s haunted doll coursing through her? Did she hear the voice of Emma’s doll saying in a sing-song voice “I’m baaa-aaack”? I hate it, all of it.

haunted doll

Next is the bread bag. Did they not have a Woolies bag they could spare? Like I know they’re 15c, but a bit thicker and more durable for a cursed 200 year old porcelain doll to be transported in rather than a flimsy bread bag.

Finally, the scalp. If these poor stupid thieves weren’t already going to be lightly cursed by simply taking Emma’s doll, by ripping out the HUMAN HAIR that she had on her head, they’ve reallllyy done it now. They are now doomed to live a horrible life enacted out by the evil spirits living within Emma’s haunted doll and her probably possessed scalp.

Fiona says that the doll’s return has been “bittersweet”, adding: “The descendant who’s connected to the doll is just devastated at the damage. Unfortunately, whoever took her had performed some crude surgery on her, so we need to get her fixed.” Demonic.

Donna Finlayson, the last living relative of Emma Mackay (the doll’s OG owner) told Stuff: “She’s been in our family for generations so we were really upset she’d been taken. She’s not a pretty person by today’s standards. She’s quite ugly actually. Maybe the fear of her being haunted is the reason why she was returned.”

Yes, Donna. Yes.