Discourse. You love it, I love it, it makes the world go round. However, if you are a member of the LGBTQ+ community, a very unique kind of television-oriented discourse has plagued you since birth. Yes, I’m talking about the Buffy gay vs. Charmed gay debate, which has defined the lives of many a homosexual.
Three women bound together by magic or one woman who kills vampires. Both supernatural. Both badass. Mix romance, drama and intrigue with a fantasy plot and you’ve got two of the most flawless television shows on the market that centre themselves around the power of women.
And who loves watching women breaking shit and looking good the most? Queer people. It’s just in our DNA.
Were you a Buffy gay or a Charmed gay growing up?— ⠶ The 1st HoeKage ⠶ (@Beardedmom) June 24, 2019
That’s why Charmed and Buffy mean so much to us. No matter how you define your gender or sexuality, both shows have something for you. Hell, you might just feel like an outsider that likes witchy/supernatural shit. Still, Charmed and Buffy have that in SPADES.
Really, you can’t lose. Both of these shows are the magical elixir for queer suffering and still are to this day. Think of the shows as representation in the media without having many queer characters at all (obviously Willow was fkn groundbreaking though). They both just have that power.
It's a close one. But as much as I loved Buffy I'll always be a Charmed Gay ❤— A.Watanuki ????️???? (@TheChucklingMo) July 28, 2020
Problem is, queer people love to divide themselves constantly. It’s an innate trait we have that causes further separation between members of the community.
Pretty much every time there’s separation you can pinpoint the exact moment that a member of the ‘G’ part of the LGBTQI+ decided to cause some shit, and there’s really no difference here.
Naturally, a rift has formed between the gays. You can either be a Charmed gay or a Buffy gay. There is no in-between. There can’t be. Both shows are so perfect and yet… so different.
Introducing the maddening discourse that has existed for decades:
listen, as a Charmed gay, can i just say: a Charmed gay is just a Buffy gay who doesn’t know any better pic.twitter.com/JW18sRT2uZ— Æsahættr, +5 Dagger (Legendary) (@villainmorris) December 2, 2017
Ok fine! I am a Charmed gay and I won’t hide in the shadows any longer! pic.twitter.com/oXI0mVaBWz— Ben Yahr (@benyahr) September 20, 2018
Forget coming out of the closet, the new coming out is revealing to the gays which show resonated with you the most growing up.
Oh so you’re a ‘Charmed’ gay— Brain Kyle Graziano (@BrianKGraziani) December 7, 2020
So what does your choice in long-running 90s supernatural series really say about you? Well, the more witchy, dark and mysterious of us often gravitate towards Charmed, while the badass fast-paced drama stans usually find Buffy more exciting. Also lesbians. Lesbians love Buffy.
Sarah Michelle Gellar as Buffy Anne Summers let young queer people know that they could stand up for themselves in any situation. It was truly about kicking ass and looking excellent while doing it, and there’s something in that for all queer people.
Identifying as a Buffy stan is really identifying with a clever story, poignant character development and a woman who fights her way through every obstacle thrown at her. It’s highkey iconic.
Meanwhile saying that you’re a Charmed stan means you may have a penchant for shows that are campy, dark, and sometimes messy. It’s a show that’s a little bit more about family, betrayal and sisterhood than its counterpart, but it’s just as much about blasting bad guys with magic.
For a kid or adult who feels alone in the world mostly run by heteronormative and patriarchal ideas and standards, women beating up demons is just the perfect kind of weird and wondrous that makes any queer kid feel at home.
Nobody asked but I’m a Buffy gay not a Charmed gay— Vic Atreides (@b1kuta) April 6, 2020
It has come to my attention that I am, in fact, a Buffy gay. This is despite never having seen Buffy but I do intend to. Thank you.— Paris Nicholson (@ParisNicholson) April 11, 2021
Apart from that, there’s something exciting about picking a side and facing off with other stans about which show is superior. In reality both shows are just as good, but humans love conflict and thus we shall have it.
becoming a buffy gay is the natural progression— hi im john (@john_bh2o) January 3, 2021
I’m proud to be a Buffy gay— Suffy Bummers (@samdamshenas) November 22, 2020
And if you were wondering, I identify as a Charmed gay. It was always on tv when I was growing up and I was obsessed with those witches.
Have I ever seen Buffy? No. Do I intend to? Not really.
I feel like now that I’ve consumed so much Charmed, it’s almost betrayal if I step over to the other side. These witches have raised me. I will never turn my back on them.
ABOUT TO BE A BUFFY GAY pic.twitter.com/8LLQdKOKaw— Bermard (@Gtsby_) November 6, 2020
i am not a buffy gay I am a gay who likes buffy. know the difference. pic.twitter.com/lv5Lq9Dg86— RIP Meryl Streep (@catcondoms) April 21, 2020