Australian Millennials (i.e. me) may spontaneously combust over today’s news: Agro is back to haunt our dreams once more.
For the uninitiated who simply clicked into this article because they thought to themselves, “Who is that filthy, furry shit?”, Agro is a puppet who dominated the airwaves in the 90s on the show Agro’s Cartoon Connection.
Us Millennials feel connected to him in the same way we feel bonded to Big Dog, Healthy Harold and The Bear In The Big Blue House.
He was just a character that we decided to like based on nothing more than familiarity, which has continued to be a theme in my life, that’s for sure. I speak only for myself with that statement. All I remember is that Agro terrified me.
And guess what? The little fucker still does.
I know this because 7News Brisbane released a video today with Agro (Jamie Dunn) and Ranger Stacey (Stacey Thompson) who you might remember from the show Totally Wild.
The pair announced that “the band’s back together” — their words, not mine — for two shows in Queensland that I have absolutely no desire to go to. I might be nostalgic bish but I do not want to see the puppet of my nightmares in the flesh. Like, has that thing showered (or gone through the washing machine since 1997?) He’s filthy and not in a good way.
As much as Agro opening his mouth tends to make my neck recoil into shoulders, it’s the guy’s miniature hands that really send me. If you’re not scared shitless of the thing, you can catch him and Ranger Stacey for their special ‘Up Late’ shows in Ipswich and the Redlands, which I imagine are somewhere in Brisbane.
I’M JOKING.
The Ipswich show will be on September 22 and Redlands will be on September 29.
“It’s going to be so much fun,” Ranger Stacey reckons.
“We’re gonna look back, we’re going to remember some of the amazing laughs we had, some of the unpredictable moments of Cartoon Connection and hopefully entertain the crowd.”
The pair were two focused on awkwardly flirting to share ticket information but I’ll be sure to let you know when they do.
Chantelle Schmidt is a freelance writer. You can follow her on Instagram or TikTok.
