When it comes to milkshake varieties, none are more hard done by, more relentlessly rumbled than the lime milkshake.
[jwplayer va98lbOs]
Look, the colour isn’t a good start – “milk” and “green” are an unholy union, and I can admit that. But the controversy ends there – the flavour is delicious, and if you can get past the green hue you’d bloody well see that. Sadly, many aren’t this level of enlightened. But I’m hoping I can convince you in this essay.
1. It’s Basically A Splice
We can all agree that Splice – that pine-lime icecream that’s got the fluoro green ice-block around it, is fundamentally yum. Right? Right. It’s a summers day go to for many Aussies, but when you think about it SPLICES are a bit of an unholy union with the whole fruit juice icy pole mixed with ice cream business.
But we don’t judge Splices, do we? No, no, no – we wholeheartedly accept their oddball nature because we’ve learned they’re delicious. But really, a lime milkshake is the same thing, just like whatever-degrees warmer and in liquid form.
2. It’s Not Sickly Sweet
I know you’d think a green milkshake would be the most sickly sweet of all, but that award actually goes to (in my opinion) vanilla, since it’s like adding sugar onto sugar with no contrasting flavour.
Lime milkshakes almost taste refreshing. ALMOST. Let’s all acknowledge what we’re talking about here is a syrup-laden milky treat. But if you lined up all the possible milkshake flavours, lime is more refreshing than like, caramel.
3. It’s Noice, It’s Different, It’s Unuuuusual
Don’t you want to be unique? Go against the grain? Un-basic? You should drink lime milkshakes, then. They’re absolutely the milk-product underdog and if you drink them you become 50% cooler for being such a weird unit.
In a world full of dating bios like “6’1, because apparently that matters” and “I just want to pat dogs all day”, wouldn’t “lime milkshakes rule” really help you to stand out?
4. It’s An Endangered Species
If we don’t all start drinking lime milkshakes they’ll fucking disappear, and to be honest they already ARE a rarity on menus these days. I remember as a kid that the lime milkshake was bloody everywhere, and now it’s a select few cafes that’ll offer the delectable treat.
I know for a fact that Daisys Milk Bar in Petersham, NSW offers them. I don’t know who else does them because I don’t get to fly around Australia and drink lime milkshakes for a job (please though, boss?).
