Look, I’m not one to condone petty revenge but I have to admit that it can be cathartic to get back at people for the most trivial reasons. Oh, would you look at that? Turns out I do condone it after all.
Depending on what it is your mate’s done to piss you off and how low you’re willing to stoop, there’s really no right or wrong answer when it comes to retaliation. I mean, I’m sure if you’re fully into common decency and all that jazz then you’d probably hesitate to ruin people’s lives just because they took food off your plate without asking, but I’m more than happy to be that guy.
Regardless of how low you wanna go, I think we can all agree that using your mate in a cutthroat meme is an effective way to get your point across, plus there’s the added bonus of it seeming like a relatively ‘harmless’ jab even though it can very easily ruin their reputation. Thinly veiled defamation is my favourite type of defamation.
Unfamiliar with committing character assassination through the medium of a meme? Check out some rough steps below:
STEP 1: Find a godawful photo of your mate.
STEP 2: Search for the appropriate meme format, e.g. the ‘douchebag starter pack’.
STEP 3: Determine what the meme usually looks like. In the case of the ‘douchebag starter pack’, you’d compile a collection of photos which represents everything that makes your mate a douche. Think crocs and socks; listing the gym as their favourite hobby on their dating apps; throwing shakas; always choosing the exact same flavour of Slurpee without ever mixing it up; dating someone who’s already engaged etc.
STEP 4: Chuck the photos in the meme format – make sure it looks very amateur.
STEP 5: Post your meme to as many social media platforms as possible to ensure max exposure.
STEP 6: Sit back and wait for the angry call from your mate demanding you to take the meme down.
STEP 7: Find another mate to take their place, they’re most likely never talking to you again.
STEP 8: Repeat steps 1-7 with your new mate.
STEP 9: Die alone and friendless.
If ya need more of a visual on how to get into the meme game, look no further:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xgMKbR9LDz8
Get it? Perfect, now go forth and ruin all of your friendships.
FYI, I wasn’t lying about people only choosing one flavour of Slurpee being douchebags. Frankly, if you stick to the same flavour of anything, be it food, drink or types of people you date, you’re dull and I’m already bored.
