Get The Fuck Out Of Here: Jetstar Is Doing $259 Flights To Hawaii RN

We have some pretty good beaches in Australia – scratch that, we have some fucking amazing beaches in Australia, but, unfortunately, for some reason, God decided to also bless us with an incredible abundance of extremely diverse and extremely lethal animals that want nothing more than the complete elimination of human life from the sea and any land adjacent.

Because life is a cruel joke, the best beaching season where all of our tropical beaches are is also stinger season, and, all year roundm sharks and crocs are just waiting for you to slip up so they can destroy everything you love with a single powerful chomp. 

But imagine a place where you could do all that tropical beach shit without fearing for your life, imagine that that place was conveniently placed halfway in between us and our precariously-existing friends to the northeast, the United States. My friend, you have just been imagining the island paradise of Hawaii.

“Oh no,” I hear you say, “it’s far too expensive to get there and I’ve already spent all my money on avocado toast and selfie sticks because I’m a filthy millennial. Why do I even get out of bed in the morning?” Despair no longer, you big baby, because right now Jetstar is running an absolutely bananas sale to celebrate Christmas, including $259 flights from Sydney to Hawaii.

There’s also a bunch of other shit going for ridiculously cheap. Ever wanted to go to Bali? Flights start from $109, roughly the equivalent of two mildish nights out on the town.

Have a geez at what else is available below:

The sale is on for a limited time and will almost definitely run out, so get on it fast, check out that shit on the Jetstar website.