A Detailed Analysis Of Kim Jong-un’s Wild Dictator Dad Summer Outfit

Make no mistake about it: Kim Jong-un is a terrible dickhead running an oppressive regime that’s almost certainly used the routine slaughter of its people as a means of quashing dissent.

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For whatever reason, the latest propaganda photos from North Korea state media are showing him in an outfit that is, for all intents and purposes, a dictatorial mood.

Kim Jong-un toured a fish pickling factory, because this is the kind of bullshit that North Korea prides itself on, with Kim in a getup that made him look less like the brutal, blood-thirsty dictator of an agitating nation, and more like the paranoid owner of a drug plantation bouncing about the mansion in the last handful of days before the feds finally move in.

Fair bit to unpack there.

The hat and high pants? That’s pure Dad. That is Dad’s On Tour attire if ever we’ve seen it. That one-two combo has laminated its itinerary, is lining up for its designated museum tour two hours early, and has a bottle of crisp white wine chilling in the Holiday Inn hotel room fridge for later on. The pants say “chicken caesar salad, please” and the hat is adding “with EXTRA dressing, thanks.” It has already exchanged email addresses with Gary and Caroline from the bus tour and has made plans to catch up back home.

Dad. Is. On. Tour.

But then there’s the shirt.

What the christ is going on there.

Not so much an actual garment as it is more the spinnaker off a small boat, that shirt should only be worn when putting a new coat of paint on a shed or attempting to coax wayward teens to join the cult you started in which squirrels are worshipped and everyone ritually chugs brake fluid.

It is a piece of shit shirt, truly befitting of a piece of shit bloke.

End of article.