Cancel your holiday plans.
Warwick Capper, former Sydney Swans full forward and current guy who needs your money is now offering hedonistic Australian businessmen, AFL fans and those conducting anthropological studies on washed up people the chance to hang out with him at his apartment on the Gold Coast.
Welcome to douche bag tourism, you guys.
For an undisclosed fee, fans will be given the chance to lodge in Capper’s shrine to himself GC bachelor pad (you’ll sleep in his guestroom on pillows emblazoned with the image of his face) and participate in cool Gold Coast activities like boating, watching the footy, cruising in his Ferrari and hitting the nightclubs (strip clubs optional).
Here are some other fun things you can do, per his website:
Champagne on arrival (flowers added if a female is attending)
A spin around the Gold Coast in Capper’s Ferrari
A nice dinner at Surfers Paradise
Cocktails and trip to a nightclub (strip club visit optional)
A morning walk with Warwick
Hang out on the rooftop
Take a spa bath with Warick
Mountain hiking
A day on the beach, including jet skiing and speed boating
An afternoon in front of the television, watching the footy (you get to sit in his favourite red Swans chair)
Capper insists all footy watching be done from his lucky red chair which he definitely didn’t masturbate while sitting atop as recently as five minutes ago.
The Warwick Capper experience starts form November. All interested parties…
The Vine via Brisbane Times.
