These times are truly unprecedented. We’re all going a bit stir crazy, doing things we would never be caught dead doing before March. Therefore, I’ve been practicing a little forgiveness, a little understanding if you will (and you should) for odd behaviour.

I’ve forgiven my friends for posting absolute BS on social media. I’ve forgiven a guy who hardcore dumped me last year for DMing me a few horny questions last week. I’ve forgiven myself for wearing the same sweatpants to the office three weeks in a row (my barista commented on this- and I have forgiven him too).

Me, a shining and most peaceful Goddess being rational and reasonable AF, doing my part to bring love, understanding and sanity into an otherwise a turbulent and burning world.

But as I was working away and minding my own god damn business last week, I heard a buzz on my phone. I thought it was the aforementioned horny guy but alas, I was wrong. This buzz was not a horny one. Not horny in the slightest.

It was for an Instagram group message. Every single person on this group chat was not known to my account. I get pulled into a lot of spam groups with messages saying “ME SO HORNY FOR A MAN LIKE YOU” if you could tell me why I get targeted for those please contact me and my assumed penis. But this one was different. It simply said “DISCUSS” in caps. There were 6 of us in the group.

I clicked on the “DISCUSS” account and recognised who it was right away. It was the little sister of a boyfriend I had for about 18 months a thousand years ago (six years). It was a different time, and I was a different girl. If I met that guy today I wouldn’t look at him twice. The bottom line here is, I do not miss or think about him in any way, shape or form since I dumped him the morning after my 21st Cowboy birthday party. I had 100 people there and he was the only one who “didn’t feel like to dressing up”. He had to go.

Me to my parents when he cried about it in my living room.

“Is this about Luke?” said one girl. I clicked on this account too. It was an account where the picture is of her in a formal dress, champagne in hand and her name is spaced out like:

I M O G E N (I M M I) (Name has been changed for obvious reasons). 
23, S Y D N E Y, A U S T R A L I A

And seven emojis: an earth, a beach, a puppy, the dancing woman, a champagne, the two pink hearts. 12k followers, and 2 comments on each picture, one is a reply from her saying how much she misses the other commenter. You know the type.

Another one said “I hope this is okay, we need to talk”. At this point, a few coffins and skull emojis turned up. I still haven’t said anything. I click on this account, the bio is “Growing into the woman I am destined to be“. That was enough for me to already know what was going on.

I HAD BEEN ADDED TO A CHAT WITH ALL OF MY EX’S EXES.

I’m shouting it from the rooftops. I will not go through this alone.

This is the moment I yeeted. God damnit, I yeeted so hard. I was more than shooketh. What on earth could be so important to do a thing like this? But before I knew it, I was pulled into a second chat, with two girls, one being the sister. “Van we are all on the same side here.”

Clearly not, my side is not wanting a side.

This is when the other girl in the group attempted to drop a bombshell on me. “He has cheated on all of us, me too. I know he cheated on you with Kate, Luke told me.” I didn’t know this, but hearing that hurt me less than that time I accidentally ordered a mild burrito instead of a spicy one.

I tried to practice my love and understanding for the whacky behaviour the boredom of these Coronatimes can produce, but this still wasn’t adding up. I don’t know who needs to read this, maybe just my ex’s sister, but there is no reason to ever do a thing like this, no good could ever come out of it. Ending a relationship with someone should be a guarantee you don’t have to deal with them or their sister’s BS anymore. If you are ever considering making a group chat like this, maybe just read a book, watch a movie, or hell even play in traffic.

The only way I was able to practice forgiveness and understanding around this situation was with a big fat bong rip at the end of the day.

Peace x