Kate Middleton Missing Was The Best Thing To Happen To Memes Since The Titanic Submersible Sunk

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Published

March 19, 2024

Princess Kate Middleton may or may not be dead, but the internet has never been more alive. Ever since the world got suspicious of the absence of the Princess of Wales and the web exploded with conspiracy theories, the quality of memes has risen to a standard we haven’t had since the implosion of that Titanic submersible filled with billionaires.

After weeks of wild speculation, terrible photoshops, and no helpful deets from the Royal Family, on Tuesday the world received two huge updates to the case of the missing Princess.

A (seemingly unedited) video of Kate and William walking around in public.
A statement from Lady Rose Hanbury denying the rumours she and William were having an affair.

Given that the citizens of the net have been treating Kate’s disappearance as a Royal Family themed true crime podcast unfolding in real time, the news that she is alive and well did take the wind from some conspiracists’ sails.

But this is the internet in 2024. We’re not going to let something as boring as “the truth” get in the way of a good joke are we?

Absolutely bloody not. Give me the Kate Middleton memes.

“these Kate Middleton pics will silence internet critics” I don’t think u understand how badly you’ve fucked this. there are now people on the internet who could SHAKE HER HAND and still claim she’s four cats in a wig
— Smooth Dunk (@SmoothDunk) March 18, 2024

And it is the result of this unfailing dedication to the creation of sick memes that has brought us into a new renaissance era for the medium.

There’s something in the various ingredients in this story that has made it absolute crack for cooking memes.

Everyone I know is talking about this. My mum is making the same jokes that my 20-year-old friends are. Zoomers and Boomers hardly agree on anything, yet this one missing princess has united the generations.

must be scary to be a brunette in England right now knowing that at any minute a tabloid could take your photo and say you’re kate middleton
— katie (@katefeetie) March 18, 2024

Perhaps part of the attraction is the Royal Family, who are always at risk of becoming the subject of a meme. Memes about the death of Queen Elizabeth II were an internet staple for years before she passed. Then when she finally karked it, the floodgates opened, and we’re all going to hell for laughing.

Kate Middleton breaks cover: Smiling Princess of Wales is pictured during visit to farm shop in image that will silence the conspiracy theorists pic.twitter.com/efYvhfmFzF
— don’t dog the bounty hunter (@allhatnoplay) March 18, 2024

Part of the meme-ability of Royal drama comes due to the fact that no matter how dark or crude a joke made may be, it’s difficult to argue that anything could be considered punching down when they are literally the British Royal Family.

Another aspect of the internet’s fascination could be due to how the Royal’s current media policy of “never complain, never explain” means that the only thing left to do is make wild stabs in the dark that are closer to entertainment than they are reality.

For example, it is highly unlikely that anyone actually believed Middleton had gone to surgery for a BBL. But, because the Palace never shot down those rumours, it was as credible as the next piece of fantasy.

kate middleton should come back with this haircut pic.twitter.com/neiM8JWJaf
— bald ann dowd (@ali_sivi) March 16, 2024

So in honour of what could be the last hoorah for jokes about Kate Middleton’s disappearance, please enjoy some of the best and freshest memes about the return of the Princess of Wales to the public eye.

… Even if I don’t believe for a second that she’s actually back.

Never let your dreams/memes die!!!

Kate Middleton Kate Middleton
before Mar. 18: on Mar. 18: pic.twitter.com/9abreUzLdx
— Mike Beauvais (@MikeBeauvais) March 18, 2024

This Kate Middleton story is crazy. I haven’t seen a coverup like this since the Secret Service deleted their text messages from January 6th.
— I Smoked The RNC (@BlackKnight10k) March 18, 2024

getting to the bottom of this kate middleton stuff. good for him. https://t.co/c0v9VqPmgf
— Liz Charboneau (@lizchar) March 18, 2024

TMZ: “Kate Middleton spotted out with Prince William.”

Twitter: “That is not Kate.”

pic.twitter.com/c96fZlaMBu
— NUFF (@nuffsaidny) March 18, 2024

Really enjoying this Kate Middleton stuff because this is the kind of investigation work I do in private whenever I think any couple I even vaguely know might have broken up
— kate (@katebeingsilly) March 11, 2024

this is where Kate Middleton really is pic.twitter.com/VJO4N1nCE7
— popculture (@notgwendalupe) March 18, 2024

Using the power of “3D” i have completely debunked claims the Kate Middleton car photo is edited. Why don’t the bricks align? Let’s see.. pic.twitter.com/kFS68c4tMe
— Richard Parry (@_RichardParry_) March 14, 2024

The writers of the Crown after reading all the Kate Middleton drama:
pic.twitter.com/IjRhFQVxXa
— Candace Kaw (@candaceisageek) March 11, 2024

if I was managing Royal PR right now I would comission a bespoke Kate Middleton Muppet and record a completely serious video with it. just double down in the most insane way
— Smooth Dunk (@SmoothDunk) March 12, 2024

The entire internet after seeing Kate Middleton without make up for the first time: pic.twitter.com/iEPUOyuXtT
— ZDragon (@IBZDRAGON) March 18, 2024

kate middleton above buckingham palace with an irish army behind her pic.twitter.com/uFt6voC2yw
— slate (@PleaseBeGneiss) March 17, 2024

I got about 8 seconds into explaining the Kate Middleton situation to my French husband before he told me, in the Frenchest voice imaginable, “ah yes, that’s why we decided not to have those sorts of people anymore”
— Janel Comeau (@VeryBadLlama) March 14, 2024

And finally, as a tribute to all of the people who are not terminally online and haven’t been following the story (all five of you), here’s one last meme to show that us Kate conspiracists contain some self awareness. Or at least, more than the Royal Family.