A bride on Reddit has gone batshit viral after revealing she had to kick most of her husband’s family out of the wedding ‘cos they “violated many of my personal rules and boundaries”.
Good for her.
Redditor u/snoopgoop7 shared the story about her deeply bizarre in-laws to the r/AmItheAsshole subreddit. Spoiler alert: she is not the asshole.
She said her husband “Ben” has a v. close-knit family who “doesn’t take well to outsiders, surprises or change”. Honestly sounds a bit like my parents’ extremely co-dependent rescue dog.
“Most family reunions and gatherings don’t allow plus-ones or spouses, just immediate family,” she continued.
“Ben has two brothers and one sister. Each of my in-laws have wives/husband, yet they still aren’t allowed to come to the majority of family events, so it’s fortunately not just me.”
Pretty obscene, right? Well, that’s not even the most fucked part of the story. Somehow it gets much, much worse.
“Ben’s family has lots of odd traditions that they do, and over the years I’ve put up with them and embraced them,” the bride said.
“They include having a homemade sheet cake rather than a professional wedding cake, wearing all white and having ALL the children walk up the aisle to toss flowers rather than having ONE designated flower girl/boy.”
Look, I’ve only been privy to wedding planning by way of my sister’s nuptials, so I’m hardly an authority figure on the matter. But the homemade sheet cake is arguably a fucking odd hill to die on, isn’t it? I just don’t understand how anyone can harbour intense feelings about the cake served at another person’s wedding. It’s just … cake.
But alas, I digress. The bride, who seems like a lovely, understanding lass, said she and Ben compromised with his family so everyone would be happy enough. The homemade sheet cake was a go, except the bride and groom had to agree on the flavour and design; everyone could wear what they wanted, as long as it wasn’t white; and, there would be no children at the wedding. Both families agreed, done deal, et cetera … NOT!
The wedding day rolled around and the bride’s family stuck to the rules that had been agreed upon, but Ben’s family decided to YOLO it.
“There were lots of children and babies and everyone was wearing white,” the bride said.
“Apparently their traditions were more important than what I had to say. Only three people actually respected the rules set in place. The spouses of Ben’s siblings.
“Ben and I were mortified. We immediately kicked them out and allowed the three people who followed the rules to stay, but they left with their partners (which we didn’t mind).
“We ended up cancelling the post-wedding celebration after some of his family members snuck inside. After we came back from out [sic] honeymoon, we were both berated by his family members and basically ‘shunned’ from his family.”
AITA for kicking the majority of my husbands family out of our wedding when they celebrated their traditions but violated many of my personal rules and boundaries?
by u/snoopgoop7 in AmItheAsshole
Oh. My. God. Mysterious Reddit bride, don’t you ever think for a second that you’re the asshole because you’re just not. Your husband’s family are certified freaks. I can’t remember the last time I heard about a bigger bunch of weirdos.
Basically everyone in the comments agreed that it was awful for the family to completely ignore the bride and groom’s perfectly reasonable requests, especially seeing as everyone agreed on them. Also, the fact they exclude folks who aren’t blood relatives is v. concerning.
Obviously respecting the traditions and customs from your significant other’s culture is extraordinarily important, but the bride replied to a comment saying her husband’s family have “sort of formed their own” group and aren’t “part of a big organisation or any local group”. So it sounds like this is just … their thing.
Straaaaange.
Image credit: Sex and the City / Warner Bros. Pictures
