Nelly Yoa, Big Fucken Liar, Cops Five-Month Prison Sentence For Perjury

Nelly Yoa, one of the most deeply intriguing cases of serial lying to ever bubble to the surface of Australian sport, has been sentenced to five months in prison on charges of perjury.

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Yoa appeared in court in Melbourne today for the sentencing hearing, noticeably free of the flash and pizzazz that saw him arrive at court last week in a Rolls Royce – one he claimed to have borrowed off of criminal underworld figure Mick Gatto – and a full “security” detail running alongside him; antics that gummed up proceedings at court so badly that his sentencing was delayed by a week.

There, a judge handed him a five month sentence on perjury charges, stemming from a raft of false complaints Yoa made to police regarding an unnamed woman, in which he falsely claimed to have been threatened by her on a number of occasions. The sentence includes an 18-month community corrections order that will commence upon his release from prison.

On one occasion, Yoa claimed the woman travelled to his home in Dandenong and threatened him, despite the fact the woman was at the cinema in South Yarra at the time of the claimed incident. In another, Yoa claimed the woman flashed a gun at him in the Melbourne CBD, causing him to flee on city streets to escape her. CCTV footage later revealed neither Yoa, nor the woman, were in the city on the date of the complaint.

Yoa’s “prominence” in Australian circles stems from a series of increasingly bullshit stories spun by Yoa to media – stories including, but not limited to, high-profile sporting contracts with the likes of Chelsea FC and the Collingwood Football Club, and a close personal friendship with Usain Bolt. His most recent and outlandish claim asserted that he was an invited VIP guest at last year’s Brownlow Medal. The reality was that he was ejected from the event after being found hiding in a toilet.

Yoa is currently in custody but is expected to appeal his sentence, meaning he could be free on bail as early as this afternoon.