In Defence Of The Horse Girl: Why Do People Hate The Greatest Girls On Earth?

A girl stands in a field by her white horse because horse girls are awesome

The term ‘horse girl’ is only ever hurled around as an insult. When one hears the term ‘horse girl’ they think ‘horse girl (derogatory)’ not ‘horse girl (complimentary).’

Horse girls are tarred with the brush of being strange. They are girls known for hyper-fixation, having an off-kilter sense of what’s trending and are often portrayed as being devoid of sexuality. But this cultural narrative must end, because horse girls are not only misunderstood by their choice of favoured activity but are also incredible sexy.  

In Defence Of The Horse Girl

First up, I need to declare that I identify with the spirit of a horse girl. While I haven’t spent a copious amount of time in the saddle of a horse, growing up in regional NSW meant I had friends who did have horses, and I would sometimes get to ride them on weekends or help look after them.

My friend had an old white horse named Misty who taught me how to take care of something other than myself and for that I’ll always be thankful.

Horse girls know the importance of commitment. They know that you need to get up and look after the thing you’ve committed to, otherwise it could potentially…die? So extrapolate a horse girl out of her horse girl context and it means that when she’s committed, she’ll be there.

She’s feeling exhausted from work but promised she’d come to that gig with you? The horse girl is by your side dancing in the front row. You’re stressed about your birthday party? The horse girl is there with a drink in hand and a few outfit options in case you need it. A horse girl is your ride or die, and will always be there when you need her.

Some Awesome Qualities You Might Not Know About Horse Girls

From spending time around horses, horse girls are:

  • Skilled at plaiting, braiding and most hair adjacent activities.
  • Understand that animals, and by extension, people need care, tenderness and kindness. 
  • Really good at brushing things.
  • Can cut carrots with precision. 
  • Incredibly organised with a good sense of routine, mostly learnt from taking care of a horse.
  • Might have ketamine.
  • Awesome ass that looks really good in jodhpurs or tight pants from horse riding. 

The Real Issue At Hand

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of a horse girl insult, you’ll know it’s used to make you feel like you’re a total weirdo. 

But at its core, a horse girl is just a girl who enjoys riding horses and being in nature. So when we use this phrase as an insult, what we’re actually doing is belittling a hobby that girls like doing.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s a time and a place to make fun of people’s hobbies (ahem, bouldering bros) but the joy of spending time around a horse is pure and sweet. A feeling that should be cherished and championed, not torn down. 

So next time you hear someone say ‘horse girl (derogatory)’, gallop, don’t walk to correct them because we can’t have people continuing to believe that horse girls are little freaks, when in actuality we’re the girls you want in your corner as a best friend to ride into the night with.