A Tale Of Two Hockeys: Joe Is Remembered By Both Parliament And Twitter

Now what we have here, folks, is a Schrödinger‘s cat-type situation: Joe Hockey is quitting Parliament today, and he both is, and isn’t, leaving a good legacy. A Schrödinger’s Hock, if you will.

On the political end of the spectrum, we have a valedictory speech from Joe that casually named his ‘age of entitlements‘ speech as *the* most influential speech in the last 20 years.

He was damn determined to let Canberra know his greatest career hits:

“SEE? I’ve done some things, man. And some shit.”
Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, who booted him out as Treasurer not four weeks ago, gave a speech so warm and fuzzy it’s like a kitten climbed up his trouser leg and pissed. He jovially declared this “a big day in the life of a big man,” saying “Joe, we love you,” while Opposition Leader Bill Shorten, in a rare display of something approaching charisma, declared him to be “no ordinary Joe,” HUEH HUEH HUEH. 

“The standing ovation spontaneously from your colleagues and the opposition should be one of the memories you cherish here because you can’t get that by just turning up, you can’t get that sort of respect, respect can’t be given by a position or a title, it can’t be given by longevity alone.”

Bill Shorten, 2015

Cherish the memory Joe. CHERISH IT.

The ‘Strayan public, who never miss a chance to remind our pollies exactly what’s what, are on the other end of the spectrum rustling up some of the other highlights of Joe Hockey’s career.

So long, Hocks, and thanks for all the shit.

“Is that a cigar in your pocket, or are you just please to be here?”
Images: Twitter / ABC.