Kylie Minogue Surprises Super Fan At The Gym, Intense Hyperventilation Ensues

Since this is guerrilla marketing where nothing is quite as it seems it’s hard to pinpoint exactly how contrived this is but for the benevolent purposes of giving its customers #pricelesssurprises, exposure to greatness and the unique sensation of being in an Eric Prydz film clip, Master Card enlisted pop princess Kylie Minogue to surprise her biggest fan, Adam, at the gym, emerging from the gilded yawn of a tiny glitter canon to sing her new single “Into The Blue” and let him touch her without security intervening. 
Considering I would suffer multiple heart attacks within 2.5 seconds of Natalie Portman emerging from behind a washing machine and taking to me at the laundromat, his response seems pretty chilly.   

Either way, there really needs to be an emoji for this.