Angry Taylor Swift Fans Have got Diplo ‘Scared’ for His Life

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Published

January 24, 2015

During a recent interview with GQ, purported small penis-haver and music producer of some repute Diplo addressed the ongoing #BadBlood between him and magical unicorn princess Taylor Swift, fretting that her fans might actually literally be trying to kill him.

While we’ve no doubt your minds are steel traps of pop culture emhemera and information about the speculated size of celebrity dongs, we’ll refresh your memories as to how all this drama began.

Looking at it now, last November, Diplo made a crack about how someone should “make a kickstarter” to get Taylor Swift a booty; Swift’s friend Lorde responded that something should also be done abut Diplo’s “tiny penis.”

@diplo should we do something about your tiny penis while we’re at it hm

— Lorde (@lordemusic) November 13, 2014

Diplo said that the exchange was all in fun and that he and Lorde are actually close mates, but that Swift’s fans were not so forgiving. In fact, he now pretty much lives in terror of hardcore Swifties after speaking out against Tay.

Per GQ’s interview:

You’re a part of the tabloids now.

It sucks for me, because now I have to not be as crazy as I am on the internet. Which totally sucks, because it’s not going to be fun anymore. But the repercussions are really bad. Like, Taylor Swift fans are really crazy. They threatened to murder me and stuff. It’s really bizarre, and disgusting. They’re the worst people in the world.

You couldn’t pay me enough money to piss off the Taylor Swift fans.

Yeah. And I’m a pretty big fan. But they’re like “I wish your kids had Down syndrome.” They’re so evil. I dissed Lady Gaga before, and the gays were never even this mean. They’re funny. These people are like mean-spirited, evil human beings. I’m not a politician. I shouldn’t have to be under the microscope for people like that.

All things considered, if a million Taylor Swift fans got pissed off about [Diplo’s IDGAF attitude and propensity for being ‘crazy’ on the internet], it doesn’t totally matter.

She has like forty million Twitter fans. Forty million! Yeah. It’s crazy. I’m a fan though. Her powers—she’s big. She’s strong, bro. Taylor Swift is very strategic with her friends and enemies. And I know lots of secrets. I can’t divulge, but I know a lot of stuff about her. And she’s definitely, there’s definitely scary stuff going on. And I’m scared. I’m scared for my life.