The first time I heard Reflection in the trailer for Disney’s live-action Mulan, I felt a lump in the back of my throat. It was an immediate throwback to Saturday mornings spent watching and re-watching the original animated movie on VCR. I love Mulan for a lot of the same reasons you do – for the elite soundtrack and total badassery. But I also love Mulan because she looks just like me.
When I was a wee kid, I used to make my own picture books. I’d jump on my dad’s computer and bash out a very basic plot about a girl named Wendy and her adventures at school, based on the life of yours truly. Then after it was printed (on sometimes important pieces of paper) I’d break out those twistable crayons and go ham. For a hot second there, Wendy always had blue eyes and blonde hair. I didn’t think about it at all back then, I was only a kid.
But thinking about it now, I know I only drew Wendy that way because I was surrounded by blonde hair and blue eyes for about 90 per cent of my childhood. In short, Mulan taught me about Asian representation in film before I even knew what it meant.
She, along with the animated Jake Long (American Dragon: Jake Long) and London Tipton (Suite Life of Zack & Cody), were the lights of my young life. They made me feel seen, included, all of that wholesome goodness. But Mulan has always been my favourite. She still is. Whenever I make mistakes, I tell myself that I’ve brought dishonour on my cow. Whenever I have congee (rice porridge) for breakfast, I always chuck a smiley face on top out of anything I can find. She’s just undeniably a part of my Chinese-Indonesian Australian identity.
Not to mention, I haven’t even discussed Mulan’s total badassery. Mulan, a young woman in ancient China, takes her father’s spot in a war because a) she loves her dad and b) it’s the right thing to do. Her dad wouldn’t stand a chance at his age and with his injury, so Mulan sacrifices her own safety and fights in his place. She does this despite her family’s expectations of her, which is to get married and fulfil her duties as a good wife and daughter-in-law. Making our family proud is a universal thing, but it’s especially important in Asian culture. I certainly felt it growing up and I still do, so it was a default reaction to just follow the family’s expectations of me. I definitely didn’t fight a war, but I battled an internal one. I knew I wanted to be a writer after I finished school but it wasn’t until the very end of high school that I actually told my parents that I didn’t want to go into the sciences. You could call it my own little Mulan moment, of sorts. It’s probably why Reflection makes me so emotional every. single. time. I listen to it.
So after weeks of watching and rewatching Mulan, Wendy had a dramatic makeover. She had long black hair and brown eyes, and she sometimes brought her sword to school which is a normal thing to brag about at show and tell. Don’t @ me. As for five-year-old Steff, she just wanted to be like Mulan. Even if that meant falling over in the rose garden and getting cuts all over her hand because she needed to defeat the Huns. Good times.
I’m 23 now, but Mulan has stayed with me ever since I first watched it all that time ago. I guess what I’m trying to say is, Mulan was much more to me than just a girl or a Disney princess. She was someone like me.
Disney’s live-action version of Mulan arrives exclusively on Disney+ next month. It’s a bit different to the original because it’s actually based on the ancient narrative poem The Ballad of Mulan, not the animated movie. But it’s still Mulan to its very core, so I’m undeniably very excited. I may cry. Actually, I very much will if the movie involves some sort of version of Reflection in it.
Directed by Niki Caro (The Whale Rider), Mulan stars Liu Yifei in the titular role, Jason Scott Lee as the villain Bori Khan, Donnie Yen as Mulan’s mentor Commander Tung, Jet Li as the Emperor, Yoson An as Mulan’s new boo Chen Honghui, and Gong Li as a powerful witch named Xianniang.
Disney’s Mulan streams exclusively on Disney+ on September 4.
