We No Longer Have To Endure ‘The Shire’

How much you love or hate dramality shows about unique breeds of people located near large bodies of water will really determine how you take the news that both Jersey Shore and it’s antipodean incarnation The Shire have been canceled.

Producers of Jersey Shore, the show responsible for contributing terms like “smoosh”, “Stage five clinger” and “DTF” (Down To Fuck) into the working vocabulary of millions, have announced that after three years on the air, the upcoming sixth season of the show will be its last.

Likewise Channel Ten’s beleaguered ratings hopeful The Shire – a show responsible for systematically reducing Australian viewers’ IQs, will reportedly complete its debut season on Monday, September 10, and is unlikely to return after increasingly poor ratings.

If you fall under the column of people mourning the loss of these shows, don’t worry: you have terrible-sounding production “The Goldy” to look forward to. I have to admit that every time I order a cab I’ll fondly remember Pauly D and his belief-defying aerodynamic hair do. Bless…