My beautiful work colleagues love MasterChef, and write incredibly knowledgable and passionate pieces about the show. I am not one of them.
I haven’t watched the show in a very long time – in fact, I haven’t watched the show since Poh in season 1 – so, before tonight, I’d lived a very blissful 11 years, watching television that didn’t make me want to fucking scream cry over a pork belly (*foreshadowing*).
Then tonight’s episode happened. I hadn’t mentally prepared myself for the feelings I would inevitably feel.
You know the Vine of that kid on Junior MasterChef who had to restart his potatoes? Imagine this panic… but inside an already-anxious Gen Z after watching 5 minutes of a reality TV cooking show. (Me. I am the already-anxious Gen Z.)
From near pastry fuck-ups to that blasted pork belly, I had not remembered MasterChef to be this anxiety-inducing.
In an attempt to cope with my newfound stress, I moved the laptop to the corner of my living room. Distance, I thought, would calm my nerves.
It did not. I then put the episode on mute, but my eyes couldn’t help but wander to the beads of sweat on everyone’s foreheads and Gordon Ramsay yelling.
It was a lot for a Tuesday night in isolation, particularly as I live with no-one but my stress, inability to unwind and poor cooking skills.
With this in mind, here are some of the best #MasterChefAU tweets, using ‘anxiety’ and ‘stress’ as the focus keywords. You’re so welcome.
God this is the first season of #MasterChefAU I’ve watched in a while and I almost forgot the extent to which every episode is a harrowing anxiety attack.
— Benjamin Law 羅旭能 (@mrbenjaminlaw) April 14, 2020
Me: “Cant wait for Masterchef, what a relaxing way to forget we’re living in a dystopian hellscape!”
Nek minute: *Having an anxiety attack over poorly portioned pork belly*#MasterChefAU pic.twitter.com/6nsBHyOsLW— Claire Boland (@ClaireLBoland) April 14, 2020
It’s only quarter to eight, they going early on the anxiety music #MasterChefAU
— Josh Barnes (@Josh__Barnes) April 14, 2020
THIS IS SUCH A WORKOUT for my anxiety #MasterChefAU
— Swathi (@swathisundari) April 14, 2020
Oh #masterchefau. So good to have you back. But also, ANXIETY.
— L is for… (@elleisfor) April 14, 2020
These dessert teams look stressed and they only just started #masterchefau
— HH (@gggviideo) April 14, 2020
#MasterChefAU stressed
— zayn (@takenzxyn) April 14, 2020
Bon apple teeth. I need a shot.
