After spending three whole days in the I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here world, TV royalty Kerri-Anne Kennerley said those faithful words and yeeted herself out of the jungle.
Usually, as this is genuinely the premise of the entire show, I wouldn’t care. But today, I have beef.
In case you missed it, during Thursday night’s episode, Kerri-Anne (KAK) was selected to do a food trial with campmates Domenica Calarco, Woody Whitelaw and Ian “Dicko” Dickson.
In order to win stars, which equate to more food back at camp, each of the celebs had to snack on kudu testicles. If they all managed to eat the balls successfully, they’d be bringing home a whopping eight stars back to camp.
While Dicko scoffed his ball back like an absolute champ, and Dom and Woody were giving it a solid crack. KAK refused to even attempt the challenge, saying she had “no intention” of even trying.
Naturally, this caused our fiery reality star, Dom, to blow her fkn lid.
“Miss big contract lady. ‘Can’t tell me what to do’,” Dom said, infuriated.
When KAK replied by saying that she’d leave the camp and keep her contractually allowed makeup for Dom and leave the jungle, Dom responded with the best line i’ve heard on prime-time television in a long time:
“I don’t want your 1989 Revlon lipstick, darl.”
Icon behaviour.
Anyway, I digress. With eight stars and food for the entire camp on the line, Dom wasn’t afraid to call her the fuck out.
“Why are you here, bro? Legit, actually, why are you here?” Dom asked. Hearing Dom call KAK “bro” genuinely made me snort.
“Literally no respect or decency for anyone else but yourself. I’ve never met anyone so selfish in all my life,” she said.
Of course, KAK was not happy.
When the trial concluded, and KAK returned back to the camp she spun a very different yarn to the rest of their campmates than what actually went down. Pretty ballsy behaviour if you ask me.
After explaining what the trial was, she put on the goddamn performance of her life.
“The deal is, there’s eight stars and everybody has to consume [a ball] or no stars. So it’s all in or nothing. I know Dicko could have, there’s no way Dom could’ve. I don’t see any point in eating a ball that could never have a result,” she said.
“So at that point Dom’s senses are a little heightened. The abuse was quite overwhelming. To be called the most self centred bitch she’s ever met, and the contract queen time and time again,” she said, putting her whole KAKussy into it.
“I would have finished, if she would have finished. It was never going to happen. That said, I’ve made a choice and it was a hard choice because I’d love to stay but it’s never gonna work.”
With that, KAK said those words and left the camp.
But the thing is, the way KAK reported the challenge back to the group was not how it went down. Dom did attempt the challenge, and KAK didn’t “have any intention” of giving it a go.
She came back to camp with the intention of spinning a narrative and winning favour of her campmates before getting the fuck out of there.
Now, I don’t blame KAK for not wanting to eat animal balls. It’s fkn gross. And it does bloody suck that she was selected for three trials in a row.
But that’s what she signed up for. It’s what she was reportedly being paid $180,000 to do. As the alleged highest earner of the season, I feel like Channel Ten wanted to get their money’s worth.
Instead, she spent three days in the jungle getting special contractual treatment.
This morning, KAK spoke to Sydney Confidential about her experience on the show and addressed Dom’s comments.
“I am a tough old bird but that doesn’t mean what people say aren’t hurtful,” she said.
“I also just wanted the camp to know I am not a horrible person. But you can’t have regrets as it’s not how life works.”
Sure, Dom could have been nicer but KAK also could have been more truthful.
